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When it rains, it pours...and these dads are blind (vent)

noidea1010's picture

When I last left off SO had SD13 and was in the process of serving BM the emergency custody orders. Since then, she's been served, SD has been told, and my grandpa passed away. So to say I've been slammed with stressful emotional stuff is an understatement.

SD thankfully took finding out better then we hoped (for now). She's extremely angry with her mom and not with SO. BM on the other hand is trying to stick to her story of lies. Called SO a POS because he actually had the nerve to take their daughter away because she was doing drugs with her in the house. Good luck with that BM.

CPS took two weeks to call SO back, but is meeting with him and SD today. Lot of good they did, he got the custody order on his own.

Now on to my (normal) vent. Anyone else have the problem of you SO or DH just not seeing that if they bring a child to the relationship, one old enough to help out, that you (the childless one, except for a furbaby) should not be picking up half the slack?!

SO and I usually try to stick to the rule of "whoever cooks, doesn't clean." Sometimes one of us with cook and clean, but it's pretty even. EXCEPT when SD is involved. To me, I should be cooking and cleaning 1/3 of the time when she's around. She's 13 not 3. If he doesn't want to make her cook and clean, that's fine, but he should be picking up that slack, not me.

I made a comment to SD last night when she tried to get out of the dishes, all three of them since I made most of the dinner at my place and took it over, about how I had cooked and cleaned the night before. SO pipes in with "Welcome to my world. Funny how your memory slacks when it comes to that." EXCUSE ME?! Oh hell no. So since I do have a great memory, I went back over the last month, listing out who had cooked, who had cleaned. Funny enough...SD was the one slacking. Otherwise SO and I were even in cooking and cleaning. What's his response when I point this out?????

"It's not a competition." Yeah, funny how that works. It's no longer a competition when YOU'RE WRONG! I'll just be keeping track...just in case you want to try again.

Comments

moeilijk's picture

My opinion: He's making two classic mistakes, at the same time.

1. SD is an equal in this house. Therefore it's ok to treat noidea like a naughty child and be snotty to her in front of SD.

2. SD is a special princess. Therefore she doesn't have to do chores and YOU, noidea, should be glad of the privilege to bow at SD's feet.