I think it'll help with his ADHD and DH agrees. It will cost 8k a school year for tuition plus extras. The cost isn't unbearable to us but it'll still be a big expense. Also I'm afraid there won't be enough left in the budget to put DD2 in private school also. SS9 is not doing well in the normal public school setting at all. He steals, lies, doesn't hand in homework, etc. We just think it'll be better for him to have more individualized attention and maybe do well in a school for a change. He has no friends also and is clueless about social etiquette and social cues.
Anyways, when SS was living with BM a few years ago, she suggested that he go to a private school for the same reasons and wanted DH to pay for it all. At that point, DH and her were not getting along at all, so he said no. BTW, BM sends her other child to the same private school. We have no idea how she affords to do that since both her and her ex- DH are unemployed and living off social assistance. They each have their own "businesses" but who knows.
SS has been living with us since last year and DH stopped paying his support to BM, but hasn't asked BM for any financial assistance. Is it odd for a man to ask for child support from the child's mother?
Technically, BM doesn't work, but somehow she has enough to send her other child to private school, go on vacations, buy brand new furniture, drive a $50k car, buy new clothes and haircuts all the time. I would really like DH to at least ask for if she can contribute something towards the special needs school tuition. Even $200 a month or something. If she says no, we will still go through with it.
I just feel so much resentment already and now we have to fork out this extra expense. I'm already basically raising SS full-time by myself anyways, while she gets to have fun. Also assuming it does help SS, I'm sure BM will be the one bragging to everyone about how SS goes to private school, even though we carry all the financial burden of it.
I guess I just need some clarity and to know that as much as it'll impact our family's budget, it is what's best for SS.