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SS is here and already driving me crazy!

newmommy05's picture

He got here last night after a 10 hour drive with DH. He was pretty excited to be here. In the short time (1 day) that he's been here I've already realized some things.
1. I actually like him.
2. He is soooo much work to care for

He is like a 4year old trapped in a 9 year old's body. He is sweet and mild mannered but so immature and lacks a lot of discipline amongst other things. I took him and DD1 to the park this morning and after that I got a migraine from just having to constantly run after him, because he kept running off. He does not follow instructions. I am getting so frustrated. DH came home for lunch just now and I flipped out on him a little bit. I told him I can't do this. I literally have to tell him to do something 4-5 times before he will do, and he will only do it if I'm waiting for him. I do have hopes that SS will get better one day but disengaging for the time being just won't work as I am his primary caregiver for the summer.

I literally have to yell at him to stop him from doing something (running away, taking apart stuff, moving furniture, etc.) So how much should I put into disciplining him? DH does parent him when he comes home from work, but he works long hours, so the most we will see him is a couple hours a day.

So my question to all you veteran SMs is how much effort do you put into disciplining your skids?

Comments

VioletsareBlue's picture

WHOOP dat Azz! Just kidding.

I put as much effort into as I feel I need to. My skids are well behaved. The "are you arguing with me?" question works like a charm with SD8 and stops her in her tracks. You have to take control and show you are the boss since you are with him most of the time.

Tell him, warn him and then punish and never give in.
Punishment is whatever works for the child .. time out .. not tv ... extra nap. Make a chart and everytime he does what he is told without reminders he gets a sticker. Then at the end of the week if he was good for the majority of the time he gets a reward.

myspoonistoobig's picture

Routine is good. Consistant punishment is also good. Keep in mind too that there is always an adjustment period of about 2 weeks during which time any stepkid will put you through the paces testing you and seeing how serious you are about your rules.

I was actually surprised with SS this time. He's been here two weeks, and while it's still been challenging I've not had to pull out his time-out chair once!

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