Confessions of a tired mommy....
oh dear.....I feel terrible for saying this but I don't LIKE her...
I LOVE all 3 of them, I know that they are better off living with us and that in 1 short year, they're on the right track, but SD13 (stb14) keeps fighting us along the way. She talks with BM every day at least once and cannot get over how GREAT her mom is and looks and how skinny she is (I am, and continue to remain XS...I was size 0, now I'm 5 mos preg and in XS maternity wear....BM has always been a damn marshmallow) And no, I don't feel like I'm better than anyone who is larger than me, its just that the only reason BM has lost any weight is because her family actually loves me, and won't stop commenting on how tiny I am...which btw, she apparently only eats an apple each day according to SD. And before you ask, no I didn't try to forge a friendship nor do I try to keep in contact with HER family. That's hers.
Anyway....SD doesn't like me and doesn't care if I die.It's funny because I'm always the one fighting for her to get things that she needs or for her to experience things that are appropriate for her age (like the Valentine's dance) or stepping between DH and her room to protect her from getting in trouble for being mouthy TO ME. I know her life will be a spiral downward if she leaves to live with BM but I'm at the point, I can't relate to her. I don't like spending time with her at all. I love the boys. They love me. She insults them for loving me. I don't want her to hurt their progress because her own is stunted. She's performing at half her grade level and only aspires to be like BM.
I'm so exhausted, I just don't want to deal with her anymore.
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Comments
Pregnancies are hard. Our
Pregnancies are hard. Our emotions are crazy. I hated SS14 when I was pregnant with the twins. Your SD is going through a rough time right now and BM is not helping. There is a reason your DH has custody. I think its okay to love them and hate them. They are frustrating and immature. I think you should do what you need to do to keep your sanity and your health. Think about this in four years time she will be turning 18. Good luck.
She's in puberty and acting
She's in puberty and acting out, it's OK not to like her much for a while. I frequently found my SD's irritating when they were 13. They suddenly get too big for their boots and think they're the last word in cool and fun. The whole 'BM is so great' thing is annoying but she's probably a bit conflicted about not living with her mother and plus it's a lot easier to be the funmum when you're part time. She'll get over it and if you're providing the kind of stability and care that it sounds like you have in your home she will probably come round and appreciate you in the years to come.
I know a lot of people that
I know a lot of people that don't like their own 13 year olds, no worries there!
I would however be pretty concerned with the weight obsession. That's a bad sign.