Ummm do all these people he is telling have to work nights or deal with the stepshits??? No. So either he is feeding them a line of Bullcrap or he is lying himself.
If I were you, I would tell your DH "OK dear, I will wake little Johnny up no problem" Then little Johnny would be woke up with a pail of freezing cold water on him when he failed to get himself up at 6 am.
And where is your DH that he cannot get them up himself??
I Don't get my DH's kids up for school. That is on him. Not my kid, not my problem.
And I didn't expect my DH to wake up my BS for school either.

You're DH is being a rude jerk and you should not be the one in trouble. He needs to deal with his kid not getting himself up.

You need to tell all of them to STFU.

15 years old is old enough to get himself up. Does he normally have a hard time waking up? Did he not set his alarm?

Whatever SS's consequences are, you are 100% not to blame.

Curious though- if you had not been there, how would he have gotten to school? What are his options? Would you have been okay with him staying home?

Not too long ago this kind of happened with my 11 year old. I leave first for work, then DH, then BS.

DH texted me at work when he left the house and said "BS was still sleeping when I left." BS should have been up 30 minutes prior to DH leaving. DH said he said something to him but did not make sure that he was awake before he left. DH's words "Guess he shouldn't stay up so late".

BS forgot to set his alarm. BS called me 15 minutes later like "Oh no I just woke up."

To me, I felt like DH should have made sure that BS was awake before he left the house. This is not something that has ever happened before, so it's not like this happens all the time.

Thankfully BS made it to the bus on time. But had he not the only other options would have been #1 for him to miss school that day or #2 me to leave work and take him to school. Not sure that those options would have been better then teaching him a lesson about setting his alarm.

Your DH is the asshole. There is no reason that a 15 year old can not get up with the help of an alarm AND 10 phone calls from his dad. And the fact that you work a night job, makes it even MORE ridiculous that your DH expects you to be responsible.

You have to stand your ground and tell him no, and too bad if he doesn't like it. I did the same, it went over like a lead balloon, but I haven't wavered. SD is not my responsibility, and if she cant be responsible enough to wake on her own (with her 2 alarms set) then it's on him to correct.

They love to blame us, because who else can they blame? They wont hold the skid accountable, they surely aren't going to say it's their fault for non-parenting.

Call me nuts (or a crazy DISNEY BM LOL), but I agree with SO..NOT with the way he spoke to you, but with his view on the matter.

Even if all the kids in the house have alarm clocks, I would expect the adult in the house with them to make sure they are all up and moving. You do that with your kids, so why not with the others?

If this were my kid, I would be livid with him and you. Him for slacking off and you for not being aware of what was going on in our home.

I get the not my kid, not my problem view, but I think it goes a bit too far at times.

What your SO and his kids do before you moved in?

You need to tell Dad that either he adjusts his work schedule or the kid can stay with Mom on school/game nites.

I make my DSO wake up SS17 when he stays over, but my DSO knows I will just stay with my Mom when SS is there bc I refuse to step foot in a teen boys bedroom when they are sleeping, a teen boy not related to me.

Your DH is wrong, wrong, wrong.

You work nights? and a baby?

SS is 15. If he gets up late, it is his own problem and any punishment/consequence is on him- it is a learning experience. Better he learns now and misses some hs sport than learns later and loses his job. Any decent parent would take this position with a 15 year old. You were nice to drive him and you are owed a thank you.

If SO cannot understand that 1. you did him and SS a favor by driving SS 2. SS getting up late was his own fault. 3, because SS was at fault, NO ONE should have expected that the other kids be late or baby be an issue due to ss- he was fortunate you were willing to drive him when you did because you were under no obligation to do so and I am sure it totally jacked up your morning- the one you start after only a couple hours of sleep.

Your SO is being not only an ass, but incredibly disrespectful to you. Both he and SS need to apologize to you.

The way it is solved going forward, is SS now gets up at 5am and it is your SOs responsibility to make sure he is up. Of SS learns how to go to sleep on time and wake up with an alarm clock. It is NOT your problem and if SS is late again- you will not be driving him.

Sorry, for some reason this one has me steamed.

Your SO is willing to treat you like crap, call you names, talk about you to "everyone", punish, yell at you, and undermine you to the kids in the home, all because a 15 year old missed a freakin high school sport thingy? I am sure SS is the next Tom Brady? Seriously? This is how your SO treats you over high school sports for a kid who is NOT yours? Are you OK with this?

At the very least tell SO, a consequence for how you are being treated is getting SS either up or to school is no longer your problem, ever. That way you never have to be an asshole again and inconveince everyone else so precious SS can have his lazy butt saved. SS can get up at 5. Since he is such a sports star, he can use the extra hour to work out.

As one of the few men who frequent this site, and I say this with the best of intentions....... I would be happy to come and punch your SO in the friggin wherever, lazy teen should get himself up, azzh@le SO should shut his mouth before someone shuts it for him.

I think both, your SO and his son, are asses.

My advice?

Tell your H that if he calls you one more name, he will find his and skids belongings on the front porc. Along with changes locks and divorce papers.

Name calling should be verboten.

So when are you going to be done being a doormat for him and SS?

You do not HAVE to do anything for SO or SS. You did not have to wait around for someone when you were given short notice.

Learn the word no and start using it.

Hope you are not cooking dinner for them before going off to work the late shift.

Just tell him you are definitely "a**hole", and as one, you aren't fit to be around his precious progeny. I mean what is he thinking? You might just damage them psychologically simply by being in the same room. He should keep them as far away from you as possible. In fact, since everyone at his school knows you're an a**hole too, you are now excluded from taking him to and from school or going to his school functions, since you might upset someone with your presence. And since your SS needs someone to wake him up every morning to make sure he gets to school on time, he really should stick as close as he possibly can to his mommy and daddy on school nights. Maybe they should even consider cosleeping, I heard it's great for kids.

Holy hell. I'm went back and read through your comments. You are being lied to and manipulated. It sounds like your SS is learning how to do the same by his father's example.

My kid has been responsible for getting herself up in the mornings since middle school. It didn't matter that I was already awake. Now that she is in high school, I typically don't see her until after school. The exception is when she has to go in early and I have to take her. I am not heartless (yet) or uncaring about my DD because I don't wake her up. It's called responsibility and I have NO intention of moving into her dorm so I can wake her up. I want and expect her to be self reliant.

Getting one's ass out of bed is a basic life skill. Your DH is not doing SS any favors by trying to task that to anyone but SS.

I haven't read any of the other comments but there is something I read on STalk a few years ago that I'll always remember about getting a lazy teen out of bed. I really can't think who suggested it, too long ago. But..

Ice cold marbles. Walk in. Lift covers up from bed. Throw em all in there. Walk straight back out that room. Every time the kid moves round, those freezing marbles will follow in the contours of the mattress. I know I'd ever have the guts to do that myself but the thought of it made me laugh!!!

This guy is in urgent need of a wife-ectomy, and you're going to have to be the one to give it to him.

Seriously, I've got a mouth on me, and he would be afraid to say BOO to anyone at all, especially to me, by the time I finished with him. Oh man. Time to declare war.

If you're physically afraid of him or his giant mutant spawn, call the cops. Do not pass GO. Do not collect $200. Just high tail it out of there. Jeezly.

My 14 yr old (who has mild special needs) sets his alarm and gets himself off to school every morning because I have to leave for work before he's up.

If your DH is sooo concerned about his son then HE needs to be the one to adjust HIS schedule to get HIS son up and out the door. Set your boundaries now, don't run him off to school if he's late. He has a mother and a father he can call right?

Stick an air horn to his ear and let it rip immensely!!!

I did not read all the comments, but I'm going left with my advice....

DH recons you are being childish for not waking up his special snow flake? You should do it... fine you will do it, this is how.. get a bucket of ice cold water and 6:05 am you simply dump it on SS - his alarm clock went off, his dad called, he ignored it, see if he can ignores a bucked full of ice water... then smile and say this is what will happen every morning if you do not get your ass out of bed at 6am.... or use a squirt bottle lol...

I used a coffee mug with iced water on my own kid.... after the second time, Deigma is awake 5min before the alarm clock goes off.... so it does work.

You sound just like Mapper. I noticed you didn't respond to the posters who asked you why you stay and continue to be a doormat. Mapper is the same way, but she did finally admit that she was/is/and will continue to be, a doormat. It was a relief honestly, I knew that she was wasting the time of those truly trying to help her, and they/we could move on to someone who actually wanted help.

Sometimes people are comfortable and happy to be used, mistreated, and abused. Those types tend to only want people to talk and laugh and agree with them. And thats ok. As the saying goes "If you like it, I love it".

I seem like an asshole to all of them.

Really? Nobody thinks he should shoulder any responsibility for not getting his own ass up on time? Part of being involved in sports is responsibility. Maybe he's not mature enough to be participating.

As for your SO, he's a douche. You should want better for yourself and your kids.

i was telling dh about your situation last night. he said you are being totally disrespected by a world-class asshole. but now reading further comments that have been posted since i last read, i just dont know what to say. he is evil. YOU deserve better. your children deserve better.

Ok first of all let me explain.. I do understand a lot of what you were saying about not realizing you were in an abusive relationship until recently.
I have been there, lived it. My XH was horrible to me. At first, like all relationships, he was perfect. We would discuss everything and talk about any issues that came up. Slowly that changed. After only three months of marriage, my THEN DH lost it on me and did every abusive thing you could do without actually putting his hands on me. I was terrified. But after only being married three months, I was too embarrassed to leave. It didn't happen again for several months. Then he did it again. This became a pattern. A pattern that started to repeat itself more frequently until it was weekly and sometimes daily. By this point I had a child and was also raising his child.
He would come home drunk in the middle of the night and wake me up to scream at me about how horrible his life was and how it was all my fault. I tried to get help from his family but they just turned their back on me. I knew if I told my parents, he would end up 6 feet under and they would be in jail. So I kept my mouth shut for YEARS.
Finally I realized that he needed me way more then I needed him. I worked hard, had a great job, and took care of myself and my child. His words and threats no longer had any affect on me. That is when he ramped up his abuse. Because his hostile words were no longer working to hurt me. I then decided it was time to leave.
After 10 years of marriage I filed for divorce and threw him out of my house. It was the best thing I ever did. He learned he could no longer control me or blame me for all the ills of his life. But it took me years to understand what was happening and how to get out. I don't want you to waste years of your life like I did.
I understand you are not in a position to get out today. But you can start the process. You can start getting your affairs in order to protect yourself and your children for when you can get out. Maybe you aren't ready to do this....you are on the only one who can make that decision. But just know that you can do it. We have all been through some type of nasty crap in our lives and can help guide you. Good luck to you dear!!

Next school year, my DS will be 11 and in middle school (wah!) and the bus comes through at about 6:50. I am so NOT getting up at 5:00 each morning to tell him it's time to get up. He's getting an alarm clock for Christmas this year and learning how to use it NOW. I get up at 6:45, so I will be able to give him a hug before he walks out the door, but I'm not going to be responsible for him making the bus. If he misses it, it will be a $10 fine for the first ride, $25 for the second, and $50 for the third. He had to pay me $5 when he missed the bus when he was in like 2nd grade. Hasn't missed it since. I would make him walk, but he has to cross a huge multi-lane road with a boatload of traffic and they don't have a crossing guard.