**I typed this in my notes on my phone. Not sure why the spacing is far apart lol**

So it’s been two weeks since major blow out 2.0 with SS19. Honestly more like major blowout 783636.0 

Few of my key favorite lines to start this blog with humor..

—insert every name calling— 

Also SS19 always runs to room and it’s us yelling up the stairs to him while he is in his room yelling back because he cowards. 

“I never did anything with him one-one”

           Was I suppose too?? ! AND if I do recall!! I took him out shopping for his 8th grade formal dance to get clothes and shoes.

“I have done nothing for him in general”

            Getting him his current job via my connections doing all his apps when he was applying for his first job and or I don’t know…everyday f’n life are not enough. Dinners, planning and contributing his bday/grad parities.. Paying for all types of vacations … cruises, mexico, cabins, amusement parks etc doesn’t count though… Those are “group activities.” 

“I kiss SS18 and SD15 ass”

             LOLL. This one really got me… SO replied back with what her NORMAL relationship with them??! ! Aka he is jealous of my relationship with his siblings.

“There was never ever fighting until I came in the picture.” 

             Another GOOD one… This is where we see BM coming out… 

“I just don’t like her” 

              Can’t give a reason why though. I told him I don’t like him either. **shoulder shrug**

There is A LOT more but only so much I can type out. This was about an hour long event. 

Well…. This is a cycle for SS19. He will be nice for about month to two months and goes right back to being a dick and doesn’t want to be told anything. He started getting snippy with both of us few weeks prior to this. 

SO stands up for me no problem gives it right back to him but once again… the one thing he doesn’t (doesn’t know what to do) is make him accountable for his actions… this is the struggle.

SO and I had somewhere to go that night so we went out came home and the next day I talked to SO. I said so what are you going to do??! You told him last time this was it etc he would have to leave… and here we are again… he disrespects everyone in the house etc… just gets told not too… and gets to go about his days… 

This is where SO goes into depressed mode and can’t handle shit IMO. I suggested I move out until SS19 does… he didn’t like that.. I said it is NOT fair to me or his other two kids. I told him he puts him on this high horse for no reason.. SO knows he’s got issues and uses that as crutch for him IMO.

I said well he has NO problems outside of the house. 

More was said etc.. I told SO to call his brothers/friends etc because I can’t be the only one telling him how unfair it is to me and the other two.

Naturally everyone came back team missk but kind of get where he (SO) is coming from… most of them have a said problem child. 

Here is my problem with this situation… he makes enough to live on his own, has been warned multiple times and oh wait!! BM lives 3.5 miles away he can go there!! He IS going to be moving there when she moves out of state! 

SS19 is always home too. When he isn’t at work 95% of the time he is home so it's not like he's an out and about teen. He also has the same day off as SO and I which is annoying TBH. 

Well! SO talked to SS19 later that day (The next day I was at work) SS19 basically said how BM is constantly f’n with his head and he takes it out on me… while I do believe she does BUT I DID say this to him during our fight… basically whatever issues he has with BM to take them up with her. 

He told SO that she just constantly guilt trips “how she’s sad things are this way.” How “if she can turn back time she would never have left” — we’ve heard this already from SS18 and SD that this was her new go too— How she always is with groups of people and he doesn’t want to hang out with them.. makes sense. He doesn’t like being around her. How BMs husband makes sex jokes about BM in front of him. Gross. Some other random stuff… he didn’t really give any specific details on exactly what she says because…we know… loyalty bond with GUBM. I do believe SOME of it not everything though..SO ate it up. 

SS19 rarely seems BM. We think he stops over there once and while. None of them really see here. SD sees her for her nail appointment and SS18 doesn’t really talk to her. He doesn’t like her. I told SO I think he is naive to how much BM is causing conflict and “gets" to them via phone considering that’s basically her only contact with them... text messages. SD and SS18 are smarter though (for now) because we know in step life.. ya just don't know what tomorrow can bring. 

I do think SS19 is the most “damaged” from her he unfortunately also thinks like her… even though there has been such lack of exposure for a long time now can’t change genetics. SO knows this… we have told SS19 that if he keeps acting the way he does he will struggle with any sort of relationship his entire life. Didn’t say this but… just like his mother. 

SO told him not to even speak to me and this was definitely it. I told SO if he doesn’t keep his word to me then I will move out. I said I’m absolutely done letting a 19 year old kid treat me and everyone else in this house like shit…. And it’s not just words… it’s actions. Example… just being gross. He says he will.. Until next time. I'll add if SO doesn't hold his word he will have an uproar vs him from SS18, SD and likely his whole family so there's that too. 

ALSO! SS18 was present during this whole thing and wanted to strangle him. He wasn’t saying anything to him just sitting in the kitchen like WTF is his problem!! I told him he doesn’t hurt my feelings so let it go (I’ve said this to SS19 multiple times too) I also pointed out that his siblings don’t like him for how he treats SO and myself.. SS19 doesn’t grasp this concept either.

And this started because the day prior I asked him to close the pantry (huffed and puffed away, SO called him out during that too)  and that day I asked him to not throw the dirty towels that were in the washer on floor and proceed to look at SO and asked him to get a basket. Claimed I “demanded” and should have said “please.” LOLL OK. So far from the truth.