Let him sulk. The nerve of him. If it were me I probably wouldn't talk to him or cook for him or do anything for the next month if he made that comment to me. Until he apologized. But that's just me.

He's being worse than the stepchildren. And he needs to get real. The silent treatment is probably just a power play to break you so you'll go back to your old ways of servitude just to get him to be nice to you again. I wouldn't give in.

Have you talked to your DH about what is a fair division of labor? Does he come out and say he thinks it is your job to do all of it, or is he just like most husbands and "doesn't see" work that needs to be done.

I would ignore his temper tantrum and talk about with him later. Maybe he needs a few assigned chores as well!

I would be frustrated too. It is not even close to equal in your home. Same as mine. I work and do everything at home too. Sd8 is lazy and so is dh. When I ask him for help he acts like he doesn't want to do it,and then when I call him out on it,he tells me he is tired of being ordered around. Total bullcrap!
I am going to make him a list of stuff to do with a big smiley face on it, that way I don't even have to talk to him about what needs to be done
Your dh is raising sd to be a spoiled brat when he undermines your asking for her help. He will be sorry for it one day if he doesn't change his tune. Sd will think she is entitled to be lazy and have people waiting on her hand and foot.

Ladies, here is a very funny essay written in the 1970's by a feminist trying to get her husband to do housework. He agrees to do it, but then constantly comes up with excuses. Worth a read...

http://www.uic.edu/orgs/cwluherstory/CWLUArchive/polhousework.html

If the kids are old enough, they darn well can do their own laundry. In fact, DH can do his own laundry as well. Or how about you tend to your kids and he tends to his kids? Or if he does not want to help out, hire a maid and let DH pay for it.

You see this is one of those things that really bothered me. You both work full time so you should BOTH be doing the household chores/washing etc. Yet it is all too often an issue for couples.

My partner and I both work full time, we both do household chores. He is relatively messy, in that he doesnt see clutter as clutter and could quite happily not do the dishes until he ran out of plates. However he appreciates that it bothers me and he would start asking what cleaning I wanted him to do. Personally even that annoyed me at the time, why was he not able to open his eyes and see what needed cleaning? I certainly didnt want to feel like his mother asking/telling him to do chores so in the end what did we do?
We basically wrote a kind of chores list, monday to saturday one or two jobs for each of us each day. (clean the kitchen, clothes wash, hoover/mop, that sort of thing).
It may sound a little juvenile but honestly its solved a petty problem. Ofcourse theres always other things that can be done around the house, housework pretty much never ends! But there has been no argument/discussion over housework.

For a few years, I was trying to be supermom. I did everyone's laundry. There are six people living in my home. On day, my SD came to me and said, "Do you want to explain to me why I don't have any clean socks?"

I was done. I taught all the kids to do their own laundry and haven't done it since. I do mine and DH's laundry plus towels. I clean our sheets but the kids are responsible for washing their own. If they don't have any clean socks, not my problem. BM thought it was terrible that I would dare make her precious angels do . . . OMG . . . chores!! My Ex said that I was using the kids as my own personal, live-in slaves. Whatever. WHATEVER.

There are consequences to entitled behavior. When any of the kids tell me I need to do something, I don't do that something anymore. They've learned to keep their mouths shut.

I would look online for ways to make chores more fun. Like setting a 15 minute timer and then at the end voting on who got the most cleaning accomplished. That person gets x (candy, small toy, etc). Or have a chore chart assigning everyone one or two chores (even the special needs can do things!) or a bowl to pick out chores - even if you do a separate bowl for the younger or more challenged kids.

You might also have to lower your own standards a bit but resist the urge to go behind what they just did and do it better or "your way."

Once they get used to that kind of thing, it becomes more of a habit than an actual chore.

Let him sulk.

1. My DH does his own damn kids laundry. I NEVER touch the stuff, even for the skid I like. He's also beginning to teach them to do their own.

2. He does his own laundry as well. I'd do more of it but I usually can't find it, he's already done it. If he notices some of mine that doesn't scare him (a towel, not a sweater) he'll do that, too.

3. I do my own laundry and any of his that I can get my hands on. See above.

You are not the maid. He's an adult. His kids are his own responsibility as is his own laundry.