You are here

SS is on the plane... I think.

justmakingthebest's picture

Submitted by justmakingthebest on Wed, 06/10/2020 - 9:13am

Last night when DH talked to SS he made sure to tell him that he would be working today and that he doesn't get reception so make sure to keep JMTB notified because she knows how to reach me if needed. He told BM2 to please keep JMTB (with my phone #) updated with travel as he will be on the ship and not able to get email or texts. 

The flight took off about 30 mins ago. I have not gotten anything from either of them. I texted SS about 5 minutes before the flight took off to make sure he made it on board (I could have been too late and he turned off his phone already). I texted BM after that. No response. 

I just got off the phone with the airline. They said that they couldn't tell me if he checked in but could tell me that part of his ticket has been used. So I am assuming that means he is on the flight. 

Great... Just great. I am already livid with both of them and he isn't even here yet. This next month is going to be awesome. I still never cleaned up his room or put sheets on the bed. I don't think I am going to bother. He is a "grown man" now, he can make his own damn  bed. DH didn't bother because he didn't think SS was actually going to show up. 

This just sucks. 

Comments

DPW's picture

Submitted by DPW on Wed, 06/10/2020 - 9:18am

Honestly, I would not put in any more effort than you feel comfortable doing and helping DH. I agree - SS seems to think he's a man, then he can make his own bed. Don't worry about stuff like that and save your energy for you. 

Good luck with the pickup. Wish we can be there for moral support!

tog redux's picture

Submitted by tog redux on Wed, 06/10/2020 - 9:24am

Interesting. BM really is afraid of going to jail.

I agree to just put in the minimal effort. Be polite and pleasant but do your own thing and let DH manage SS.

lieutenant_dad's picture

Submitted by lieutenant_dad on Wed, 06/10/2020 - 9:29am

When you pick him up, and for the remainder of the day, keep the conversation cordial and light. Don't berate him or try to have any deep conversation with him about how he hurt you, etc. The last thing you need to do is get into a pissing match with him with no witnesses or video of having a chat with him.

Do any of your in-laws live nearby? I'd send him to their houses on the days DH works. That way you aren't dealing with him and he isn't being left alone.

Just breathe. I know you're a mixed bag of emotions of all of this, and you don't need to get it all figured out before picking him up or even once he's there. Do what you have to do to be happy. Heck, maybe not being Mary Sunshine will resonate with him and he'll realize being a tool to do his mother's bidding hurts other people, which means he doesn't get all the niceties that come with being there for a summer visit.

justmakingthebest's picture

Submitted by justmakingthebest on Wed, 06/10/2020 - 9:42am

I wish I had in-laws near by! Unfortuately all my in-laws are in the mid west too. 

I am just going to be calm and cool over the whole thing. I am am just picking up fast food, not asking where he wants to go for dinner and bring that back to the house and call it an evening. DD and I will hang out, watch some TV and hang with the dogs. 

There may be a snip of, You were told to keep me updated with travel, you dad can deal with that when he gets home- but that is as far as I will take it. If he says anything else, talk to your father, I am not involved. 

HE does still have a chance to redeem himself at his layover. He might text then. His mom... Well I know you shouldn't wish for a semi to take her out on the highway on the way home... but here I am. 

lieutenant_dad's picture

Submitted by lieutenant_dad on Wed, 06/10/2020 - 9:53am

I wouldn't even snip. Just tell DH and let him be the "bad guy" once he is physically in your home.

I'm glad you're taking DD with you as a witness/buffer. It may prevent you from losing your cool and prevent him from being a total arse if that was his plan.

Don't wish for BM to get hit by a semi. Wish for recurring genital warts and an incurable case of pubic lice. The burning and itching for the rest of her life would be better punishment.

justmakingthebest's picture

Submitted by justmakingthebest on Wed, 06/10/2020 - 9:55am

Good call

ROFL

tog redux's picture

Submitted by tog redux on Wed, 06/10/2020 - 9:57am

Yep, just be the taxi service.

When you get home, hand him some sheets and he can make his own bed. He's a man now, as he keeps reminding you.

beebeel's picture

Submitted by beebeel on Wed, 06/10/2020 - 9:38am

Is dad picking him up, or do you have to do it? Uhg. Sending wine disguised as juice as to not offend the grown man baby boy.

justmakingthebest's picture

Submitted by justmakingthebest on Wed, 06/10/2020 - 9:43am

Dad has a 24hr duty day today (we didn't know his schedule would change when we booked things 3 months ago)- so it is all me! DD is coming with me though. 

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

Submitted by ProbablyAlready... on Wed, 06/10/2020 - 11:31am

GOod luck an dkeep us updated! Hopefully this will be similar to the last visit where he was actually a decent kid!

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Wed, 06/10/2020 - 12:13pm

Have a mental margarita and BREATHE. Or skip the mental marg and do some breathing exercises and relaxation techniques.

Pick up SS. Be polite and cordial, like you would be with a new coworker. Like LD said, let your DH be the "bad guy". 

Hoping all goes well for you, hon. Fingers crossed and prayers sent. {{{hugs}}}