Ongoing school struggle
The difficulties continue. This year was DH's turn to have SS11 for Thanksgiving. No school, of course. But DH made him get on his Chrome book and complete a few assignments that hadn't been submitted. A couple of in-class grades also popped up as zeros. DH asked if he'd even turned anything in. SS just shrugs.
Today, DH gets calls and texts from the school letting him know SS wasn't at school. BM texted then to tell DH SS had a fever and was throwing up. DH replied maybe he needed to see the doctor. No response. He's spending the day with BM's parents and they reported he's feeling a lot better.
Uh-huh.
I can count on one hand the number of times this kid has been sick in the seven years I've known him. And suddenly he's sick five times in four months? Each time on a school day. Each time with a sudden and miraculous improvement.
DH said he's suspicious, but "you can't fake fever and vomiting." I told him he might want to Google faking sick. There are tons of sites out there.
Anyway, I told DH SS probably should see a doctor to make sure there's not a legit problem.
Regardless, his mom and her parents aren't going to make him keep up with assignments while he's out, which means he'll get even more behind. And when he comes back Sunday, DH will have to sit with him and make him go through and do whatever had piled up.
SS is smart. No question. But he's lazy and he got used to As and Bs with minimal effort. Now he's being challenged and can't cope. Yet he's not being given skills to do so and is instead being allowed to avoid and avoid so it becomes a mountain of work.
Ugh. I'm staying out of it.
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Comments
That’s what’s happens
With kid. School work is easy They just answer the question. No effort, no studying, No system or strategy ,,to look up things, work out things. He wasn't working at school. Then things get hard ,,they are lost,l. Bet every time SS was sick, there was a test, he would fail, some work assignments he had to turn in. Or had to do something in front of his classmates.
He suck because he wasn't prepared for school
Your DH has to teach his DS how to study, how to figure out his assignments, how to do the hard work of school or he wii be totally lost. What looks like he is already
Absolutely. He's trying. But
Absolutely. He's trying. But every time he talks to him about it, SS starts crying and/or yelling. And, of course, every time he goes back to BM's, he falls behind again because she and her parents pretty much let him do what he wants. They seem to live in fear of upsetting him.
Doesnt get better
But better to stay out...
Agree with Clove
Stay out of it. Let your DH handle it because it's going to get worse and then you will be the one to catch the hell. Mind you, you'd be doing and saying all the right things but it doesn't work when both parents aren't parenting. You will become the target for trying to "help." All your DH can do is stay on top of his kid's work on his custody time.
Same exact thing happens here
BOTH skids will start getting zero's and not turning in homework, especially SS16, because he's lazy. Crazy will let them call in sick as many times as they want- it's really miraculous how many 1-day sicknesses they have at her house, and how they never have any here....when they get sick here they are legit sick for days. It drives me nuts but I completely let DH handle it and try not to even say much because somehow he will end up getting defensive. He does handle it and yells at them pretty good about zero's and their grades immediately improve, until next time...
Sounds about right. DH gets
Sounds about right. DH gets into him, talks to him, makes him sit down and go through all assignments and prove he's done them, etc. Then he goes back to BM's and spends the week with her and her parents and he falls behind again.
It's all kind of ridiculous. She and her parents are all highly educated, successful people, yet they show no interest or inclination to teaching SS similar values.