Hi all-

I kind of fell off the grid there for a bit....things took a bit of a turn with SO. We put a lot of space between each other a month or so ago. I came home from work one day and we had it out. It was like the tension we both had was just building and we exploded, I packed a bag and I left and stayed at my moms house. I drove back down the next day and he had started to pack all of his things up. So i proceeded to do the same. Beyond that situation, the house we were renting from was just full of problems. And it just had a darkness and negative energy to it. So I can tell you packing up all my shit was almost a relief. It was an excuse to get out of that house.

I had walked out on a Monday and I didnt hear from him until Thursday. He left me a note saying that he didnt want to leave and he  wanted to salvage our relationship. Of course I felt the same way, but there needed to be a giant change. I needed to be a priority,i needed to be respected. I no longer was going to allow being walked all over by everyone. I know it sounds absolutely ridiculious that we both just walked away to figure out what we needed to do. But holy crap its like a 180.

He is currently staying at his parents house ( or was I'll get to that in a bit) and I am staying at mine until we can find a place to  have a fresh start. So I would still be able to spend time with his daughter, we were meeting at the park by  his parents place on my home from work. I pass his parents house, and of course nothing new his EW is in drive way..,so it did cross my mind, they switched days because she was going away..why is she there? But whatever, I was excited to see my SO and his daughter.

So i proceed on to the park- and my SO texts me that hes going to lose his shit. He was trying to stop at his parents to get a shower and get his daughter and shit hit the fan. I figured he was talking out of his ass again and wasnt going to saying anything to his EW and his mother. Oh boy was I wrong. LOL He unloaded and unloaded hard. About everything that he has built up over the last year and a half. He shut his EW and his mother down. ( I WISH I COULD HAVE WITNESSED IT LOL ) The EW probably because she felt embarassed threatened full custody....nice you want to just treat your daughter like shes a piece of luggage.

I think the best part of it was " we were married you know, and hes like I couldn't sign those papers fast enough i couldnt stand being around you"  Am I an asshole for loving every minute of that?? LOL

The lack of boundaries finally got to my SO- he needed front line experience with it and I knew when he moved home that it wouldnt be long until something triggered him. And I'm glad it did. He stood up for himself and he stood up for us. And its about damn time.

So going forward (once we find a place), We will go back to the normal schedule and when they aren't picking up from daycare (at gmas) they will meet at a designated location and scheduled time. He will not be going to her house and she will not be coming to ours.

 I will no longer be doing drop offs or coordinating anything. I'm stepping back. The only time I will alter my work schedule to have his daughter is if it benefits our weekends with her and our plans. I am no longer bending over backwards for people that really don't appreciate anything.

We will not be attending any of his family holidays, birthday parties etc this is per him. This is the best I've felt in this relationship- I'll be able to enjoy my time with his daughter when shes with us and then not overthink shit when she isn't.

Here's to hoping this sticks!!! I'm trying to be open minded!! Thanks for reading my ramblings!