A. Last Father's Day scenario: Two of my bio kids called him to wish him a happy day. One of my bio kids came to see him and brought him a card. His bio son neither called nor showed up. His bio daughter called but ONLY to rant over the phone about his wife (that would be me). She apparently was still on her rant from Christmas (the last time we heard from her).

B. What will happen this year? Stepson. Have heard from him a total of twice in the past year. In December when he called and called his dad every name under the sun. Why? Because his mother had left a whiney message on our phone about how disappointed she was in how little my husband did for his 36 year old son. (yes, mommy is still interceding for middle aged kids...including the 36 year old who lives with her and has never had a steady job or relationship). My husband had called her back and let her have it. Soooo his son got on the phone and what he didn't say doesn't bear repeating. I have NEVER heard ANYONE talk to their father like that. EVER. Of course he was showing off for mommy who pays his bills. Next, he got on FB and proceded to tell the world that the reason his dad was such an ass was his horrible wicked stepmom (news to me. Last time I saw him I was once again bending over backwards to give him a good holiday).

So that was Stepson's one contact. The second was when he called my husband to get sympathy for a cyst he had cut out of his neck. Note: NO APOLOGY for what he had done or said before. Just "whine, I am 36 and everyone else is feeling sorry for me cause I had minor surgery. Your turn, dad. Never mind I called you every name under the sun and tried to drag down your wife's reputation."

What do I expect? Ummm. Don't know. He might call his dad. He might not.

C. What will happen this year? Stepdaughter. Since her last rant last summer I have had no contact. Her dad did visit her at Christmas at which time she seemed to indicated she wanted to "forgive stepmommy" (!!!!! EXCUSE ME????) and "let it go". Uh...I think after all you did, lady, it will take a little bit more than shoving it under the rug for ME to want anything to do with you.

What do I expect? She wants to shove under the rug without discussion or accountability what she has done. I have been doing that for over 25 years and no, not doing it again. So, she may call him, or it is possible she will show up.

D. And that brings us to the main fear. That she shows up. And that she expects me to embrace her as if nothing took place. And that my husband also expects the same. And it isn't going to happen. Husband and I have been working at rebuilding our lives and relationship after all this. It is good. Fragile in a way, because it is best if we simply ignore that those two draw breath, but good in every other way. EXCEPT if she says I ought to jump, it will be ME in trouble with him if I don't. And not this time... no. Too many years I have done that...won't go there again.