Let me say that I am 22 years into my marriage with DH. He had 2 sons and a daughter and I had one son. We had one son together.  His are ages 36, 34 and 30. Mine is 28 and ours is 18. From the beginning the step children's mother was a lunatic..she talked about me like I was a dog. To the kids. I vented about her to DH NEVER to her kids. I always had the thought that one day they'd see who the jerk was. The now 34 yo (the only girl) has always been an issue. The two boys did see the light and now call me mom they have nothing to do with their mom. I love them like they were mine. The girl though started at age 14. I tried being more understanding thinking of all she'd gone through.  She'd be a total bitch to me,rude,antagonizing while daddy wasn't home..when he got home she wanted to pretend to want to know how my day was and happily interact with the family. One thing about me is I DO NOT PLAY GAMES. I let her know in front of her dad that after how she would treat me when he wasn't home that I was not playing her little game of pretend.  She huffed and cried wolf and went back to live with her mother. I hated every minute of seeing her face.  Over the years she tried very hard to break us up. I really got tired of being told to be nice to her. Why? Even after she was grown she couldn't act like an adult. She was a money hungry give me brat. Give me this or that.  Every kid got their first car GIVEN to them. They had to buy their own insurance and if you wrecked your car so sorry..you bought the next one..she let someone wreck hers and actually called us on vacation because she saw a nice little mustang for sale. Would we get it? Um HELL NO...she always had that rules dont apply to me because I'm the only girl. She managed to graduate high school and the only time she called was when SHE WANTED SOMETHING!  She drifted around..decided she was gay and has literally spent 14 years as a student. She has tried to get him to cosign loans for school..I questioned her as to why she didn't apply for Grant's and scholarships..she said the deadline passed. I said well you are married to your wife now why doesn't she pay ...or cosign a loan. Come to find out there were loans already out there she was defaulting on. I said no and let the little ungrateful witch have it..I stated all the health issues DH has and that he wasnt going to spend his golden years supporting her.  I want to be the better person here but it's all dramatic drama and woe is me with her. I literally can not stand her voice or having to hear the same sob story for the 1000th time!  10 years ago she went to AA and NA and had to right her wrongs so she said in front of DH what I'd told him she'd been doing for years to me. He was very quiet. It took all I had not to say I frigging told you so! Now her favorite thing to do is text me stuff (attention seeking) to see if I withhold the info from DH. Tonight's text has her with a possible eye inflammation that could be tied to immune system ..if I even remotely believed that...but it's a ploy to see if daddy will say do you need money? This is constant...I've decided to let DH know she has eye inflammation issues and is taking a steroid and that's it. Its going to be tied into a conversation about how red my eyes are from allergies. I just dont need the stress of her anymore...there is NEVER anything positive and it's all tied to her needing money in some form or fashion..my thoughts are she's 34..time to figure it out!  It's always a HANDOUT for her and not a hand up. The boys have needed money a few times ..but they both worked hard and it was a hand UP for them. Whew thanks for the rant guys..I needed that