I have read about disengaging in numerous places and I recognize that I have already started doing this due to my frustration with how my wife parents. I am not being backed up in reinforcing what we had agreed to were our limits and the boundaries and rules change without my knowledge. I recognize that each time this happens, it is setting an expectation in the weed smoking SD and setting a precident for my BD who at 10-years old, loves her sister and can be influenced.