OT - Zoom/Conference Calls
Is it really only Tuesday? Feels like Thursday already. Gads.
Zoom/Conference calls. I have been over them for soooooo long. Yes, it's great to be able to work from home, but the Zoom calls have moved into the Ridiculous Realm. Especially since Super Upper Management has decided that our work will be tracked in new, improved ways in 2021. One of those is that they have generously allotted a whopping 2 hours each week for Zoom. Two hours. TWO? Puh-lease. I have three Zoom calls every DAY that total 2 hours. Add in other Zooms I have throughout the week and my weekly total is at 14 hours. FOURTEEN HOURS A WEEK ON ZOOM.
Granted, not all of these calls last an entire 30-60 minutes. But too often, they exceed the time. And if you're thinking King Pita is part of that excessivess, you win the teddy bear!!!
IMO, Zoom/conference calls should have a set of rules...
- With Zoom, there is NO need to announce who you are before you begin speaking (King Pita). Zoom has this neato, uber-advanced feature that SHOWS who is talking smack dab in the top-center of my screen. Every time KP has something to say, he must announce, "This is King Pita." Yeah, effer, we knooooooowwwww. Besides, after 9 months of ever-increasing Zoom, I know everyone's voices much better than their faces.
- Unless you're talking, MUTE IT!
- KP, we do not need your yappy little dog taking part in this already irritating process. Put the yapper in another damn room.
- Hey, Mumbles, it is sooooo great that you agree with or have an opinion on every freaking thing everyone says. But we don't need to hear you constantly muttering "mmhmm", "oh yes', "definitely" the entire facking call. MUTE, dammit.
- Time limit. Hey, it's great that you're busy with multiple tasks. But the entire team doesn't need to know every teeny tiny detail of that you're doing. You might think you're impressing the boss, but you're a) wasting time, and b) ticking off your teammates who need to get back to work. Suck up to the boss on your own time; not ours.
- Monitor yourself. Zoom, like a good cell phone, picks up EVERYTHING. Including your little huffs and sighs, Princess Drama (who is a man). You have now gained the unflattering reputation of being overly sensitive, theatrical, and difficult to work with. Kudos, dude!
- Background check! And by that I mean, when you use the camera aspect of Zoom, make sure your background is work appropriate. Yeah, Mr. Meek-n-Mild, I saw the BONDAGE CUFFS hanging from the top of the door frame behind you. Along with that oversized d!ldo on the table next to the door. *shok* Backgound, people!
What would you add to the list?
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Comments
Bondage cuffs and a dildo in
Bondage cuffs and a dildo in view of co-workers?? *lol*
I think you should have said.
I think you should have said. ... HEY WHAT IS THAT??
I do declare, SteppedOut,
I do declare, SteppedOut, that would be admitting I know what those things are! *biggrin*
Right?! I mean, hey, if that
Right?! I mean, hey, if that's what floats your boat, Go For It! But I will see those things in my mind every time I see/hear Mr. Meek-n-Mild. *dash1*
Mr. Meek and Mild knew they
Mr. Meek and Mild knew they were there. Add exhibitionism to his kinks.
His screen is not normally at
His screen is not normally at that angle. Maybe he and the Mrs jarred the desk when they were playing...
First off, it's Wednesday,
First off, it's Wednesday, not Tuesday!
Second, OMG, the mute issue drives me Nuckin Futz. After 9 months of these Zoom meetings people can't remember to mute themselves. Our VP is tech-challenged and even though I've told her how she can mute others as the host, she can't seem to figure out how to do it, and hasn't assigned someone in the know to do it for her. It makes me crazy. MUTE YOURSELF you morons.
Praise little baby Jesus, it
Praise little baby Jesus, it IS Wednesday! WOO HOOOOOOOO!!!
Thank you, tog. My day has just improved 150%! Especially since Mumbles is on vacation today and tomorrow. *yahoo*
I like my boss, but she is too... timid to mute anyone. Sigh. If Evil Aniki was hosting a meeting, she would be working that MUTE button like a lion tamer works a whip with a pride of lions. Apparently, those bondage cuffs bring out the Dom in Evil Aniki...
~hunts in closet for old knee high leather b!tch boots~
I wonder what kind of look DH will give me if I put those on...
Oh yeah, when I run my team
Oh yeah, when I run my team meetings, you are muted the minute you zoom in if you don't do it yourself.
Evil Aniki wants Ultimate
Evil Aniki wants Ultimate MUTE Control!!! *diablo*
DJ Aniki!
You need a Teams cross-fader so you can bring in lulliby music to Captain Ego's episodes.
Evil Aniki wants to play
Evil Aniki wants to play Beethoven's Symphony #5...
If Evil Aniki was hosting a
If Evil Aniki was hosting a meeting, she would be working that MUTE button like a lion tamer works a whip with a pride of lions.
Girl, you are cracking me up!! I spit hot tea on my keyboard and monitor!! *lol*
~hands Watereddown some paper
~hands Watereddown some paper towels~
Sorry! *biggrin*
We use teams at work
And it has 2 features I love. First there is a little hand icon that toggles on and off. In my meetings the rule is raise your hand if you want to speak. Then the organizer has the ability to mute all. Love, love, love it. Even your avatar indicates mic status that little ring is purple if your mic is active idiots! And I feel ya on the number of virtual meetings. Some weeks I spend 30 or more hours on back to back meetings. I have mastered the muted potty break.
I am one of those freakishly private people ---nobody needs to know where I am or whether room looks like, so I either blur or is one of the generic teams background . Hides the cocktail on the post 5 o'clock rin overs
Crspyew, 30 hours is bloody
Crspyew, 30 hours is bloody insane! I'm supposed to clock 38 hours of productive time. How the heck can one be productive when your computer is tied up by Zoom? Sheesh.
I have also mastered (mistressed?) Muted Potty Break. *dirol*
Darlin, can't you just use a coffee mug or some sort of opaque and nondescript container?
Nope
I am a purist. I want to drink my beer out of a cold bottle clad in a Cleveland Browns coozie and my white wine from the appropriately shaped chilled wine glass. My work day stats at 6:30 most days so if you want me in a meeting after 5 it will be in my terms!
in all seriousness I have a standing late day meeting with my good friends who happen to be head of hr & finance. We call it our cocktail hour and we actually get a lot accomplished and laugh a lot. This has been a really hard year. We take our joy where we find it.
Alas, I am a stickler for the
Alas, I am a stickler for the proper glass.
My day starts at 0600. If you want me on a meeting after 2:30pm, you a) pay me overtime, or b) it's makeup time for the last day of the week.
I hear you on that joy. This year been a struggle.
I'm still on holidays
Definitely not missing the Zoom/team calls. Had two with family on Christmas day and that is the most since 18 December.
What is it with people scheduling the d*mn things back to back? Like Crispyew, I have some days with the first call at 7 or 8am and then straight through until 7 or 8pm at night (thankfully they haven't been running well into the night since late summer). After 12 hours straight I'm exahusted and brain fried. There was one day before Christmas that I literally didn't leave my desk for 12 hours. Its insane.
Eww at the co-workers special toys. For me co-workers are like parents are to their teenage kids - sexless beings - and this is how I want them to stay.
I cannot tell you how many
I cannot tell you how many times Mr. Cool (pleeeeeeeease let him be the boss when the boss retires!!!) misses a Zoom, is late, or has to hang up to dial into another because he is overbooked. It's ridiculous.
King Pita is also King Offender. Whenever that effer schedules a Zoom, you can guarantee it will run past the end time. Half hour? Not when KP is running the show. More like a whole hour. Last week, a 30 minute KP Zoom lasted damn 117 minutes. Yep. I timed it. That jerkwad has zero business being "in charge" of anything more complicated than tying his shoes. Can anyone recommend some nice slip-ons or velcro-closures for KP? *diablo*
I think the back to back
Results from the same group of people repeatedly getting the challenging projects. Most of my back to backs are generally with the same folks but different topics. My position is the equivalent of an operations manager so scope is broad.
Which makes one question why
Which makes one question why the group with few/poor results remains...
On vacation until new year
On vacation until new year but definitely do not miss zoom calls, nor anything else that has to do with work, if I'm honest. It's a nice break. You need one too Aniki!
DPW, you lucky lady, you! I
DPW, you lucky lady, you! I DO need a break. DH won't be too keen about it, but I am seriously considering a 4-5 day weekend in January or February. Just Because.
Please do it, for your own
Please do it, for your own mental health. You really do deserve it.
I'm barely even checking my work phone. I figure if it's important, they'll track me down... lol. I really needed this break.
If I do take that time off, I
If I do take that time off, I need to make it count and do some "reprogramming". My stress level is through the roof. Christmas was zero stress because we had no celebration, so no cleaning/cooking. I didn't even cook (we got carryout). By 10am Monday, it felt like I'd been working for days. Blech.
Can't the host of the meeting
Can't the host of the meeting mute people themselves? I love this feature on most virtual calls.
Luckily we don't have too many online meetings. We've stuck to our regular meetings, twice a month for our group, and then I have two (30 min) one on ones per month. Add in the randos and it's not bad thank goodness. I think most people don't want us to burn out.
It is Wednesday. And here it's freaking DARK still at 8:45 am due to low clouds and rain and too much wine last night = double tea intake and tired.
Luckily I only really have one thing to take care of today for work work. Otherwise I'm starting to slowly put away xmas stuff without DH noticiing. He refuses to take things down until the 3rd. I like it gone as of the 1st.
The host CAN, but does not.
The host CAN, but does not. It's likely she is afraid of offending someone (she is overly sensitive). We seriously need someone to take the reins and actually control the darn meetings. Mumbles is one who gives every minute detail and it's annoying. Summarize it! And no, the majority of us do NOT want you to share your screen and show us what you're doing. Why don't you and the boss let the rest of us hang up and you can waste just HER time instead of all of ours? Ish.
Sunrise in da north woods is after 8:30am these days (8:40 today) and the sun starts setting aabout 5:15pm. Oh-dark-thirty!
Psssst... what kind of wine?
Agh, weak meeting leaders
Agh, weak meeting leaders drive me crazy. Leads to exactly what you describe.
"Sunrise" today 7:57 am
Sunset today will be 4:28 pm
Wine was a sumptuous red blend of Cab, Merlot and Petit Verdot from WA State and was most excellent with the lamb chops! I think the small amount of sherry I had for dessert put me over the edge.
15 years ago, I had a boss
15 years ago, I had a boss who had zero tolerance for that sort of thing. Meetings were as short and to the point as possible. Side conversation? He'd halt the meeting and say, "Is that something you need to share with everyone?" (It never was.) "Then table it until after the meeting." Any issues that did not include every attendee were left until the end so the non-essential peeps could get back to work. Add that he was always pleasant, understanding, fair, and never lost his cool? All managers should be like he was.
Yummy!!! I made a beef dish last night and drank the Cab I used making the dish (if you won't drink it, you don't cook with it!). Nom nom nom... I haven't had a good sherry in too long. Must find some...