Does she have this right???

Does a BM have the right to just show up at your house whenever she feels like it? I really think it's rude that she assumes just cause her kids live here she can just show up without asking me or DH. But what do I know?

alwaysthemom's blog
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One important thing,

She calls the kids and tells them that she is coming over. And no this has never been her house. DH and I built this house together.

My kids biggest cheerleader

I agree with Cruella...

Me and BF had the same issue with BM. She automatically tried to hide behind the kids saying "They are my kids and I don't have to call each time I come pick them up." My reply to her was "Yeah well if you want to take it that way, then this is my home and I will call the cops and say you're trespassing" and ever since then she has called my BFs cellphone.

"Look at how far you've come and stop concentrating on how much further there is to go."

I agree

It's just not polite to show up on your doorstep. Even if she tells the kids she is coming, it is not their place to invite her. I could understand if one of the kids forgot something they needed like homework or sports equipment needed for practice while at your house but that stuff should be worked out with the adults not the kids.

We had this issue at one time

We had this issue at one time, but it was settled in court. At the time, we were lucky to get a knock on the door before she came in. My DH is half retarded and did not really seem to concerned with this. I pitched a fit and it still took our counselor telling him that it was unacceptable before he put his foot down. Then she threw a fit about it in court, saying that we must be hiding something from her, well the family court told her that she had no right to be in our home. In fact, they set the rule that neither parent is to exit their home or vehicle at drop-offs and pick-ups (kids are 9 and 10). So I completely agree with you. It is rude and disrespectful of he to make herself at home in YOUR home. Geez, Is nowhere sacred to these BM's?

Um, no.

I DON'T THINK SOOOOOOOOO!It's disrespectful. She does NOT have the right. Period.

When my ex and I do drop offs, and pick ups, there is a unspoken rule between us; we don't go into each other's house unless invited. We've set the boundaries and we both respect them, end of story. Then again, I'm one of those BM's who actually doesn't really care what my ex does or doesn't do. I divorced him and I am so much happier now having gotten away from him, so why would I want to hang around and try to get back into his house and his life when I spent so much energy and $$ trying to get away from him? That's just dumb! I would rather drink cat vomit, mixed with broken glass and gasoline than get back together with him. We are like oil and water and we don't mix.

Take what you will from this, but keep coming back! We're here for you!

MJ24

If I leave it up to

DH HA HA HA. Those of you who know, that doesn't work. I just get pissed off cause he doesn't think those things are a big deal. Damn ostriches, gotta love em'. But to set it straight, she doesn't even get out of her car. She knows better. It's just irritating to me that she just shows up. Of course I would love to throw a brick through her windsheild but that wouldn't be ladylike, right? So I will take matters into my own hands once again. Cheers guys, I'm havin a glass of wine before the battle.

My kids biggest cheerleader

BM use to do the same thing

When I moved in with BF the Skids weren't following a set visitation schedule since BM didn't want the kids that long. So we told her that when she wanted to see the kids or have them over she needed to call BF. Since he worked evenings and I don't I would watch the kids and have to deal with her. BM would just show up and want to see the kids, which would turn into a 30 minute visitation with her trying to leave behind her dog. SS would get upset since BM would tell him that she was going somewhere and he couldn't go because he had to stay at his dads. It would piss me off. She would also call SD on her cell phone and tell her she was on her way and to meet her outside. BF and I would have no clue until we would see someone pull into the driveway and both kids run outside. That stopped quickly especially when she tried to take the kids home with her. She called them at 9:30 after they had gone to bed and they went outside, she sent SS in to say that BM was taking them to her house to stay the night and BF said NO WAY and BM throws a fit and didn't leave until 11 pm. I was pissed and told him no more cell phone for SD and unless BM calls first no kids. A few times she has forgotten this and will try to see the skids but we always tell her no not unless you call and then its a maybe.