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WTH... grrr! Again going into my house when D is gone

RLZ0073's picture

Submitted by RLZ0073 on Tue, 10/29/2019 - 5:52pm

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Teenage Stepchildren

There is absolutely no reason for these hellspawn to come into my house while their Dad is overseas... ESPECIALLY to come in and take MY sunglasses... and it has been overcast, gloomy and rainy the past several days... no need for them. PLUS BM gets $2k a month in support buy them some gosh damn sunglasses!!!

 

AND without texting me or telling me!!! They have NO RIGHT to do that!

 

i can't stand them AT ALL!!! They cannot turn 18 and get out of our lives soon enough!!!

Winterglow's picture

Submitted by Winterglow on Wed, 10/30/2019 - 5:21am

Well, he's fine with you having your privacy violated and your belongings stolen so that should balance it out.

When his kids learn to behave respectfully, THEN maybe you could reconsider.

Another alternative would be to go to the police and report the theft ... What do you think he'd prefer?

Winterglow's picture

Submitted by Winterglow on Wed, 10/30/2019 - 5:30am

In addition ...

There is absolutely no reason for them to be there if their father is not there and even LESS reason for them to be there if YOU are not there.

 

RLZ0073's picture

Submitted by RLZ0073 on Wed, 10/30/2019 - 6:07pm

They'd at least text me saying, Hey (me), May I go to Dad's and get his blank... 

so far they've taken stupid shit... my sunglasses, and my set of Pilsner glasses that I've accumulated from my triathlons and half marathons that are very sentimental to me... WTF?!? 

and again leaving their dirty sanitary napkins behind... ugh.

 

the younger one wants to borrow that tent and it's been sitting on the back porch since Sunday... all she had to do is text me ask where I put it for her to access.

these kids leave me dumbfounded. They had a stay at home mom but they have absolutely no discipline or respect for anyone...

hereiam's picture

Submitted by hereiam on Wed, 10/30/2019 - 7:47am

If your DH is overseas, his kids have absolutely no reason to go into your house, especially if they are nosing around and stealing things. This really is a no brainer. Stick up for yourself.

You are not locking his kids out, as they have a place to live, and they don't need to be in your home if their dad is overseas. That is your home, they cannot just come and go as they please, without notice.

ndc's picture

Submitted by ndc on Wed, 10/30/2019 - 11:28am

I can guarantee that I would be madder about these skids invading my privacy and stealing my stuff than my DH would be about me locking his kids - who don't belong there unannounced when he's not there - out of the house.  Seems like your husband should be more upset that his kids are stealing from you than that you change the locks so they can't go into the house at a time when they really don't need to be there. If he's not, then he's not a great husband.

It seems like it should be easy to explain that it's necessary to lock the house so thieves don't come in.

Siemprematahari's picture

Submitted by Siemprematahari on Wed, 10/30/2019 - 11:11am

F@ck him getting upset about HIS kids being locked out.....

How about they are stealing your sh!t???

He can miss me with that bullsh!t!!!

Let him get upset.....oh well!!!

Jojab1636's picture

Submitted by Jojab1636 on Wed, 10/30/2019 - 10:42am

It is easier said then done when you are the one that is trying to keep the peace and be adult like and the bigger person.  Part of locking them out  seems wrong -I get it.  You shouldn't have to protect your things in your house from them. I'm there right now.  I put a lock on our bedroom door because the 27SD has a history of going through my clothes and taking whatever, whenever.   However, in your situation,with the DH gone - go ahead and change the locks.  Say it is for your safety while your DH is gone.  No need to mention that it is actually because of the Skids.   It is simply becasue you want to be safe. You want your house to be safe and secure while you are out.  What age are the Skids? Do they live there 24/7?  Have they always been "in and out" of the house or is just since DH has been gone?

It is frustrating.

 

RLZ0073's picture

Submitted by RLZ0073 on Wed, 10/30/2019 - 6:20pm

15 & 14. No they primarily live with their BM and her boyfriend whom she moved in with them less than 2 months after meeting him once his now ex wife kicked him out. Classy.

theyre usually not in and out when he's here... only here during his custody weekends.

ive tried to be nice and offer to take them to dinner a couple times but they never respond to texts.

 

screw em

advice.only2's picture

Submitted by advice.only2 on Wed, 10/30/2019 - 12:09pm

Do the kids live with you? Or are they just EOW? Can you get a keyless lock, one that needs a code and can be changed while he is gone? Then when he is home they are given the code?

RLZ0073's picture

Submitted by RLZ0073 on Wed, 10/30/2019 - 6:28pm

And I have the tool to retool the locks...

I guess I'll retool them the moment he leaves and change them back right before he gets home. This way they'll be confused as hell when they try to get in while he's gone.

i work over 45 minutes away from home so it's scary to know after the fact that they've been in there. Plus one of them has a bad habit of leaving doors open and it unlocked... like frickin cows in a barn

SteppedOut's picture

Submitted by SteppedOut on Wed, 10/30/2019 - 6:51pm

BM doesn't work and has access to your house keys. She could be snooping in your house while the kids are stealing from you.

Just sayin'!

Trying to Stepmom's picture

Submitted by Trying to Stepmom on Sat, 11/30/2019 - 10:44am

If so, I change the passcode so that if they enter unannounced they can't turn off the alarm and the cops will be called. That might deter them from showing up unannounced. 

My SD doesn't have a key to our house which is mostly a blessing. But she also lives far enough away that she can't just drop in. (Because it would be rare that BM would drive all that way, unless SD whined enough to her.)

RLZ0073's picture

Submitted by RLZ0073 on Sun, 12/01/2019 - 9:57am

This is all not worth it anymore. I thought it was depressing being alone in my single lady house... but being in a home I don't like, with these rotten girls and a dad and BM that just do not care... meanwhile I get the brunt of it? Why do I deserve this?
maybe it's better for me to find another single lady house and just plan on being alone forever. I just do not understand how these hell spawn think that they have the right to help themselves to my stuff. I'm not their mother (as I would've put them 6' under by now with this behavior) and they treat me like crap... so you're entitled to not asking and freeloading because???

MaryJ's picture

Submitted by MaryJ on Wed, 12/04/2019 - 12:31pm

You are allowing this behavior in your home, end it! Let your husband know by any means that you are fed up and will no longer be disrespected in your home.

When your DH experiences your wrath of being fed up, if things don't change, they never will.

Personally, I was not going to let my stepchildren disrespect me in my own home where I pay the bills, nope!

I have never tolerated being disrespected by anyone and was not about to let children take me down that road.

It's been said my wrath crossed the line, but I was fed up and it was the only way to get results. 

Some people take kindness for weakness and literally need to be shown that there's another side to you.

No fu*ks given on how they feel afterward, because surely none were given in regard to my feelings.

For your own well being you need to put an end to this behavior immediately or your suffering will never end.

I'm sorry you are going through this and I wish you the best.