My step daughter is disrespectful towards me but not in front of anyone especially her dad
My stepdaughter is 13 and an only child. she lives with us part time and her mom part time, more with us. We have been married 4 plus years and I have been in her life since she was 7. She is very immature for her age and wants "daddys" attention all the time. She is big enough to stay home by herself, babysit for other kids, stay up late but not big enough to go to bed on her own. She insists that "daddy put me to bed" Of course her being the only child daddy does what she requests, he doesnt want to let her grow up and when he is around she wants to be treated like she is 5. It is driving me absoultely crazy. Now she is disrespecting me, but wont do it around her dad. she will ignore me if I ask her to do something, or tell her to turn the tv down. If i say something to her that she doesnt like she tells her dad on me. Of course he has always taken her side and thinks im jealous of her but in fact I am not. I think the opposite, when she is here at our home she follows her dad around like a puppy. She will smart off to me but not infront of him. He has in the past not backed me up with it comes to correcting her. There is no dicipline in the house she does what she wants, no chores, no responsibilities, no bed time...i think she is trying to cause problems by running to "daddy" when me the step mom says something she doesnt like...even if I say would you clean up your room etc. I am at the point I dont want to be around her at all. doesnt help that dad doesnt see my side. I have no dicipline "rights" I just have to put up with it. any suggestions..sorry for the long post.
Have you brought this
Have you brought this disrespect issue up to your husband? As a rule, if your SD (or any child) disrespects you then you need to call them out then and there.
If she's still being sneaky then pull SD and DH in and tell them both what's going on. I.E...."so SD what was the meaning behind you calling me a....." Get my drift?
I have brought it to the dad
I have brought it to the dad but he thinks im makeing it up, he picks her side over mine anyway.
I would approach DH about
I would approach DH about the matter as a topic not when each time it happens...ie...DH these are the examples 1,2,3 of SD being disrespectful to me. If this doesn't change then I will have no other choice then to completely withdraw myself from her. And that includes any help you need from me.
Then follow through with what you say and the situation is in his hands.
thats when you video tape
thats when you video tape it. works great. it's living proof and no one can argue bout that
Even with video evidence most
Even with video evidence most of these guilty parents won't admit to their children mis behaving they will just accuse the step for being mean for taping.
Wow I love this post as
Wow I love this post as well. This is my life with my fiances kids and fiances sister. I am trying to learn to disengage from them but am not sure how to handle that whole thing. I am always feeling in termoil and sick, i started anti depressants today and I start counceling tomorrow. Hope this helps.
wow,, would love to talk one
wow,, would love to talk one on one with you. i couldnt get signed on for ever..how can we chat? i love your post.
Wow, this sound like my
Wow, this sound like my story. Met my husband when she was 7, she's now 13 and sooo disrespectful. Thinks the world revovles around her. Follow's him around all the time. never gives us a chance to even talk without her being here. I mean what 13 yr old wants to stay at home. never makes plans with friends. and her mother never gets her anymore. she wants nothing to do with her. My husband always says I'm to hard on her and he never disaplines her when she back talks and it drives me crazy. and when he isn't home she's even worse. i mean sometimes i wish she didn't live with us. she can't see that she has it so good with us and acts so spoiled and rotten all the time. to make matters worse, i am almost 8mths preg and i know that she may get worse with the baby coming. i just want to tell you i totaly feel for you and i hope things work out.. for both of us.
Lol
Wait til she's 17!! You'll want to vomit.
Whew! She is a lot like my
Whew! She is a lot like my 16 year old SD...trying to possess dad all of the time. This is just so frustrating!!!! I am sure you, like me, are trying to get along and even trying to ignore some of the crap that goes on, but you have to talk to your husband. My SD doesn't say much to me but with her it is more her actions toward my H. I took a picture once to show him what they looked like all hugged up on the couch with her huge butt hanging out of her shorts. My H was like...she is my daughter and I don't see anything wrong with that pic. Keep talking to him and letting him know how you feel and suggest that you all have a talk together. Good luck.
* "There are two things over
*
"There are two things over which you have complete dominion, authority, and control over - your mind and your mouth".
Finally!!!
My SD is so jealous of me and all I want to do is get away from her. It's like if I open my door she comes running out on PURPOSE with all her makeup on and I know she is trying to make me feel bad or something?? She literally flirts w her Dad in front of me and today she walked around practically naked in front of him. I'm so grossed out and sickened by her. She needs to quit trying to f her Dad and get the heck out of my house!
This whole Lolita bullshit
This whole Lolita bullshit between pubescent warped sexually frustrated daddy focused incest oriented girls is nauseating as is the Oedipus complex equivalent of boner dominated pubescent sexually frustrated mommy worshipping boys who pine after their mommies.
I think SPs in these situations need to make intimate interludes with their spouse a regular very vocal, passionate and obvious, though behind closed doors, event to make reality an unavoidable repeated lesson for sexually territorial incest oriented SKids to deal with. Then add belly laughs followed by "Quit pathetically pining sexually for your Mommy/Daddy. He/She is my husband/wife and has no interest in you sexually. Knock your sick crap off." Then take the spouses hand and retreat for a loud passionate Earth shaking loud orgasmic interlude.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
And have fun!
My SD has been exactly like
My SD has been exactly like this since she was 7. My husband put his foot down and she straightened up for a year. Right at a year of being decent towards me and showing me some actual respect she went right back to how she was and it's so much worse now at 14. Now she just disrespect the whole side of our family even her poor grandma. Nobody believed it for years because it was just directed towards me and not in front of other people. When she finally got bold enough to act this way towards everyone is when they finally saw how she truly is.
And hopefully they wrote her
And hopefully they wrote her off.