frustrated beyond belief!
My husbands youngest daughter still pees her pants and the ved at almost 14!
Ice talked to my husband about it and he gets mad like im trying to attack his daughter.
Shes only here two days and i know that this is going on but ger nother who has her full time has no clue?
I also had a bio child that is here part time and we have a room they share with one queen bed.
Normally they arent here on the same days so it works out
Well they happened to ve here on the same weekend and shared the bed
My husbands daughter peed the bed and my daughter woke up soaked in her urine and was peeved!
Needless to say i threw the bed out and bought two singles.
When i got the beds home my step daughter pulled pout because i had given my daughter the day bed and her the plain single.
Now my husband is giving me attitude over it but i think vecause it was his daughter that pissed the bed and ruined it and i paid for the new beds and my daughter had to wake up in his daughters piss that she deserves the day bed.
Im probably going to have to replace his daufhters mattress again anyways since him nor his ex want to address the issue!
This being the same kid that
This being the same kid that stole from me and both my daughters not once but three times !
I had to call her mother because her father wouldnt do anything about it.
Hes scared to talk to his own kid !
The apology i got from her for stealing was "it was an honest mistake" wtf!
Am i crazy or is this ludacris÷
We got into tonight about the
We got into tonight about the bed.
All he said i should just give her the day bed and if she wets the mattress just change it out!.
I told him thats disgusting and ridiculous to even think that way.
So he says "should i just make her sleep outside in the truck".
What a sad excuse for a father.
No matter what i say its an attack on his daughter and im favouring my children!
How First World problem of
How First World problem of him. If his daughter pees the bed again just replace the mattress.
Cover the mattress until she gets a clue. And remind him she will not get many sleepover invites if he doesn't get this sorted out.
Her husband was right to call
Her husband was right to call her out on what she did. What she did was mean and petty. It was a stereotypical SM move.
A 14 year old is not wetting the bed on purpose.
No she was forced to buy a
No she was forced to buy a new bed because someone elses child pisses the one her daughter sleeps in. What's she supposed to do. ..fork out even more of her money so poor widdle bed pisser Doesnt get her feelings hurt. She was forced to buy 2 beds because if she didn't bed pisser would ruin the new one. So she had to buy 2 so her bio was able to sleep in a clean piss free bed. I would have bought a blow up mattress if super dad was that disgusting of a parent and then i woukd kick his arse out
I'd have bought a new bed for
I'd have bought a new bed for my dd and myself and told him he can share a bed with his pissy daughter until she learn's not pee in the bed.
I would tell his dd under circumstance is she even too touch let alone sleep in you DD bed and if she ruins her new bed she will only be getting a mattress on the floor as it is not acceptable to be 14 years old and pissy a bed like a baby.
I can't believe the
I can't believe the disgusting attitude of most of you here...that poor child. Can you imagine how terrible she feels, wetting the bed at 14? Imagine the shame she's feeling. That poor girl.
Not one of the adults in her life is doing a thing to help her. You should all be ashamed of yourselves.
I doubt any attempts at
I doubt any attempts at shaming is what this girl needs, nor will it 'help' the situation.
Six teenage kids (three his, three OP'S) in the home? No teen who functions both mentally and physically is going to pass herself deliberately out of laziness. The five other teens already, I'm sure, ridicule this kid and spread the tales all over the halls of middle/high schools.
Instead of fighting over who gets a plain verses fancy looking bed frame and getting 'shaming' tips from a stepparent venting board, I'd hope that the OP would instead use all the energy to convince her DH to see a physician with his daughter.
A disengaged SM would not
A disengaged SM would not have purchased a bed for the SD. An evil SM would purchase for both kids and ensure her bio had the better item.
It's like purchasing dresses for the girls to wear to a family event. SM decides to go shopping for both kids. She goes to Nieman Marcus and gets her bio a beautiful dress. For the SD she heads to Kmart and grabs something crappy off of the clearance rack.
The OP could have purchased the same bed for both girls.
She could have purchased a bed for her kid and told her husband to do the same for his kid
If you're short of money, you
If you're short of money, you call husband and tell him you need X amount to complete the purchase.
Or buy both girls similar items.
Or purchased for your kid and tell husband to do the same.
I agree 100% about the parents not dealing with the bedwetting. However, that not an excuse for what the SM did.
It doesn't particularly
It doesn't particularly suggest in the OP that SM gave her DH a chance to go get his kid a bed.
"Needless to say i threw the bed out and bought two singles." followed by "When i got the beds home my step daughter pulled pout because i had given my daughter the day bed and her the plain single".
She pitched the soiled one and raced out and bought two new. She states she paid for the beds.
For the little information disclosed *we* could interpret the scenario as Dad knowing nothing until beds were in home and set up as he walked in from his 6am-3pm shift.
See how that works? With no facts we're free to fill in the blanks.
So to answer your question "Why was it her problem to buy a bed for his kid in the first place?", to me it appears she made it her problem. *shrugs*
Has there been any medical
Has there been any medical attention or help for the 14 year old step daughter?
Coming late and not reading
Coming late and not reading all the comments prior ...
SD14 most likely has a physical condition. Have the lackluster bioparents taken her to the doctor for this issue? It is a documented, physical condition with treatment options which may or may not include medication. Ignorant bioparents and ignorant SM all shaming a child for a biological condition ??
BD was caught in the backwash of SD's bioparents and SM's neglectful parenting. She got pee'd on as a direct consequence of: 1.) sleeping in the same bed as SD; 2.) Biodad and BM did not bother to lift a finger and take the child to the pediatrician to figure out the troubles with enuresis. 3) waterproof mattress pads were invented in the 1950's and available at Walmart or over the internet worldwide. 4.) SM is more than happy to shame and blame the kid for a biological/physiological issue.
OP/SM, you were so self-righteously outraged on your daughter's behalf that you over-corrected by buying her a pretty bed because "she deserved it." "Golden showers" got your daughter a great new bed. If I consider it, do I get a new car ? Seriously, though ...
Take the girl to the doctor. Acknowledge the uncontrollable and stop shaming the poor thing. BTW, I pee'd my pants at the gym this week.
Time to tell DH that he
Time to tell DH that he either deals with is bed pissing 14yo daughter's issues or she will not be visiting any more until he does deal with it. Next visit make sure her bed is wrapped in a waterproof zip on liner and have a box of adult diapers on her bed with written instructions that she does not use the bed or any other furniture in the home unless she is wearing one. Have a private 1:1 discussion with her about this problem and confirm whether or not she has ever seen a doctor for this problem.
Either way... she needs to wear the adult diapers and you need to protect your furniture from any "accidents" she may have.
Time to hold this kid accountable even if daddy won't. That DH and BM apparenly have not gotten this kid some medical help for this problem is nauseating.
As for giving her the day bed.... nope. This kid is a thief and a bed wetter and neither of the donors to her shallow and polluted gene pool will do anything about it. So you are going to have to. Your kid gets the bed that she wants and SD gets what is left as long as it is embarrasingly waterproofed and her crap is dealt with in a very obvious and public way. Since daddy and BM won't deal with it raising the pressure on the 14yo to address the issue for herself may be the only way this will be addressed.
Daddy needs to extricate his head from his total parental failure ass.
Good luck.