This is just what I needed! I have been venting to my girlfriend and she just keeps telling me to leave him! I am new to this and do not know all the abbreviations. I have been married for 2 years and with him for 5 years. My husband does not make my SS8 follow the same rules that my BS9 has to follow. My SS lives with us b/c his mother is a crack head. My husband has had custody since he was a year old. The rule in our house is that you must eat all the food on your plate (child size portions, mind you). My BS will sit there until he is done eating while my husband will cover for my SS and put his food down the garbage disposal when I am not looking. Food and drinks are also not allowed to leave the kitchen but my husband will bring my SS a cup of chocolate milk to his room every morning. He does it when i'm in the bathroom and thinks I don't know. The thing that got me last week was my husband bringing home a huge cookie from work for my SS...nothing for my BS. This is totally unfair and my BS realizes it. My BS goes to his BF's house every other weekend but my SS is home with us. On that every other weekend, my husband takes him anywhere and everywhere. He has a later bed time, eats what he wants, sleeps where he wants...etc. He basically has full reign of the house and gets treated like a king. My husband never does any of these fun activities when my BS is home! I get so frustrated! Both kids earn an allowance and if they want something it needs to come out of their allowance. Well, i just discovered that while my husband says my SS paid for something...he didn't! He is lying and buying it for him....but my BS pays for everything with his own money. My SS is always whispering to his dad to get what he wants. I am the only one who tells him no so he doesn't even ask me for anything anymore. I just want to scream! It's ok to tell your kids no! My husband defends everything he does and thinks it's cute that he hides in his room all day with the lights off, curtains closed, watching TV. He is rude to me and my BS when his father is not around but acts like a perfect angel the second his dad comes home. He doesn't help out around the house. He never does his chores (it's not like he needs the money since his dad secretely buys everything). My husband treats hime like he is the adult in the relationship. The other morning I was in the kitchen putting away dishes and my husband comes down the stairs carrying my SS and puts him at the table. He then TURNED OFF THE LIGHTS because SS doesn't like to see light in the morning! I live here to and was doing something! I feel like I am the maid and child care provider at times. He makes me feel like i'm not important. I resent my SS becaues of this. I just wish my husband would tell him no sometimes. Help! I am going crazy!