I DON'T WANT HER
Good Morning Friends!
So here's the newest situation. BM of my SD (15) was in jail on a warrant arrest back in September. During that time we found out that she had been arrested previously on the same charge as this one- driving while suspended with no insurance and invalid or past due tags. We also found out that once again she was on the verge of eviction- 3 months behind in rent. So she gets out after 4 days in jail and 2 weeks later gets fired from her job. She has not worked since the beginning of October. We aren't sure how she is getting her bills paid- but we have a good idea... I can't imagine that she has anyone who has the means to pay all of her bills for any length of time tho and she's really not cute enough to get a sugar daddy- she's dated a lot of ex-cons and disabled guys who get monthly checks.
So here is my issue. When she gets evicted, and it's going to happen, I do not want SD to live with us again. I have taken her in everytime BM gets evicted and it's always a shit storm. DH and I have talked about it and he is on my side that she cannot come live with us again- but how strong his will is when the time comes is yet to be seen. We have had issues lately with him doing everything for BM despite what I say. But that's another story all together. My MIL is still very close to BM and thinks SD does no wrong- so my solution is- SD can go live with her. She and my FIL live right across the street from us so DH can go see her anytime he wants to. Am I wrong that I refuse to let her live with us or that I expect my DH to agree with me that she can't? And if he caves in the moment, am I a bitch if I move out until she goes back to BM?
OH and just a side note that we found out this weekend- SD(22) has moved back in with SD and BM and is dealing Heroin out of the house. Even took SD (15) to a deal in a parking lot with her.
Shit storm- Suspended weekly
Shit storm- Suspended weekly from school, stealing Rx meds from myself and DH for her BF to OD on, BM telling her that we took her and won't give her back (that was the first time she lived with us when she was 8 ) , telling BM that all we do is fight and scream at each other (DH and I have had exactly 3 fights in our 9 year relationship- the only one she ever witnessed was due to her mother berating me and my DH not standing up for me). She is not allowed, even now on weekends, to be alone with me in the house- at my insistance- because of lies to her mother that I verbally abuse her when DH isn't around- never happened- so to protect myself I am never alone with her- there is always a witness. More shit storm- "arrested" for inappropriate behavior in a park where minors were present- I will just say it was her and her BF- you can figure out the rest, and then running away for 2 days because she was grounded from said BF and we finally found her at his mother's crack house. Constant lying, stealing, drama,and laziness. Enough of a shit storm?
Call the police and tip them
Call the police and tip them to SD-22 dealing and contributing to the delinquency of her minor sister. Put all of their toxic asses in prison and just maybe you and DH will have a chance at salvaging SD-15. But.... I doubt it. In that case .... Time for some forced early emancipation action on SD-15 IMHO and for you and DH to wash your hands of that entire shallow and polluted gene pool.
IMHO of course.
Nope. The back and forth, not
Nope. The back and forth, not to mention her issues, is a huge red flag.
I would have been okay with my SD living permanently with us at one time, but just here and there whenever BM was in trouble, nope. And had she been a hellion, nope.
Stick to your guns.