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Are you on your way out because of skids or your SO's disrespect?

surfchica's picture

Submitted by surfchica on Tue, 11/08/2016 - 5:37pm

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Blended Family Issues

Hi everybody. For those of you who are done or close to being done or planning your exit strategy, how many of you fine people are at the end of your rope because of the actual behaviors of the SKIDS or your partner's disrespect of you? Or is it both?
As for me it is more about the partner. My SD12 has annoying habits. Yes she drove me a bit nuts. But she is not disrespectful openly and not mouthy. My spouse is disrespectful openly and mouthy! Cares NOTHING about my needs. It is all about the SD. I was a convenient nanny and ATM.
Spouse is a lazy parent and blames anybody else for the kid's behavior but the kid. No consequences. Nothing is that big of a deal. Meanwhile I have been pulling out my hair for 2 years. So I would say it is mostly my spouse and not my Skid that did it for me.

Acratopotes's picture

Submitted by Acratopotes on Wed, 11/09/2016 - 1:04am

I replied on your other topic - and all I can add... close your wallet and hide your car keys...
SD wants a lift - tell her ask your Dad, DH asks you to transport SD - tell him, NO, your responsibility as her parent not mine, I might do it if I get some respect and appreciation

Rags's picture

Submitted by Rags on Fri, 11/11/2016 - 8:35am

I think that it is always about the partner. If the partner is an abject parental failure and can't keep their spawn in line then that is the fault of the partner no less than a directly disrespectful, manipulative, or abusive behavior is the fault of the partner.

onmywayout's picture

Submitted by onmywayout on Thu, 11/17/2016 - 3:59pm

Yes precisely for all those.reasons and more. Tired of being an ATM and bring used so skids and ex wife can get child support and tuition. I am fed up with the disrespect and always being last on the priority list.

CLove's picture

Submitted by CLove on Wed, 01/04/2017 - 12:13pm

We have spoken before. I agree it is the parents responsibility, they are the ones that form the basis of the children's morality and they are the foundation of their behavior.

I recently found out SD17.5 was caught shoplifting for the second time. And he got angry with ME. Because he said I will "use this information in any argument against her".

I used to completely lay the blame on SD. However, I have come to realize that she was CREATED to be this way, she wasn't BORN this way. I am seriously considering my exit strategy. It comes as no surprise to me now that I know what I know, that SO is also looking at his exit strategy. He's now looking forward to a $250 fine. Hes looking forward to her turning 18, and having to be responsible, without the proper tools.

So I would say its both.