So things have been ticking along nicely with me, my SO and his 3 kids. EOW arrangement remains in place which I know is a God send compared to what some of you have to deal with! He's even blocked BM on his phone as he got sick of the argumentative messages from her and all communication was restricted to pick-up / drop-off and kept very brief. Hell, she even stopped coming to the door to have a rant at him which was an utter blessing!

So anyway, one night we get home from work and he told me she had text him from one of the skids phones (hers being blocked) but he said he was going to leave it as he was due to pick them up the next day and surely it could wait until then. Then she tried to call me (!) and sent me a text asking that I get him to call her as it was very important. I just sighed and told him to get it over with, see what she wants.

After he had a lengthy phone call with her, it turns out that the school have contacted her re: SS9 as he distressed some other kids in the playground by shouting at them "I am going to cut your Grandma's vagina out with a chainsaw and kill her". Yes that's what I thought. When the teacher's came out to drag him into the office, they then discovered he'd been sending pornographic images to another girl the same age as him which were apparently "hardcore to sick".

This child has always been odd, he lacks empathy, is mentally and physically lazy and is pathologically selfish. He is also emotionally manipulative, questioning my SO why he hasn't got a photo of them as his phone background (it is one of me and him) and why they didn't come on holiday with us (he takes them every year but we also have holidays on our own). I think he regurgitates a lot of this from BM.

Anyway I wanted advice on whether you think this is something to be really concerned about or just a kid that has gone too far what with the access they have these days to the internet, etc. My SO has played it down, saying that all kids push boundaries, the only difference now is that everything is traceable due to phones, PC's, etc.

Oh and for the record, this kid got an Iphone when he was 8. I said straight away that this was ridiculous and he was far too young. I also once caught him watching Scary Movie on a tablet (a part where it was showing a sex toy) and he asked me what it was. I went straight to SO and said "Do you know what your child's watching on that!"

After this latest episode, I criticised my SO for not ensuring there were appropriate restrictions in place and for not taking my points as above seriously. I said he and BM are now reaping what they've sown and if the kid continues on this path of weirdness and totally inappropriate behaviour, I will not be prepared to deal with him in my home as a teenager. For Christ's sake I had to instruct him to send the laptop back which he was gonna give to him for Christmas!