Not sure how to handle this...
I had a situation recently that I wanted to get opinions on how I might handle it going forward. My DH decided he wanted to have SS(27) and his girlfriend over for a BBQ. I was fine with it. When they arrived, my DH ran to the door opened our dog gate and so the dogs ran to the door, one of which will attack other dogs if he gets loose. I jumped up ran to the door and yelled "Don't let the dogs out" out of panic! My husband then cussed at me (in front of SS and his friend) "Well Jesus Christ". I was floored and very hurt. SS hops on the bandwagon when my husband tells him it is okay to come in and SS says "Are you sure? I don't want to do anything to get you in trouble." I am not happy with any of them at this point. My husband made me look really bad and proved to his son that he isn't happy with me and that it is okay for him to treat me badly. It makes me sad thinking that he can allow this kind of behavior to go on in my home. I really am taken aback by my DH behavior towards me and would like to take SS testicles (and DH) and stick them up his rear end. SS has cost us lots of money due to a defaulted car loan that my husband cosigned on without conferring with me. What do I do?
What you should have done is
What you should have done is to tell DH, IN FRONT OF skid..."DH...next time you cuss at me, you will regret it in more ways than you will ever know." And say it with a smile.
You can actually still tell him that.
Honestly, since you asked for
Honestly, since you asked for opinions I'll give you mine. I think it is much ado over what is really a small issue, BUT I think it is an indicator that you have resentments and anger over other things.
Let's face it - sometimes even the most loving, polite couples will snipe at each other. I think the situation as you described it, was merely your DH's gut reaction to your reaction about the dogs. And your SS response, IMO, was a way to lighten it up a bit.
I don't know that a mere sniping comment is proof somehow that your husband is "very unhappy with you" nor does it make you "look bad". I also don't think that SS's comment was a purposeful insult to you.
After all, DH didn't scream at you and say, "MrsWho shut the f-up, you are a g-damn idiot!" and SS didn't say anything like, "Yeah - who are you MrsWho to yell at my Dad about the stupid dogs - f-off!"
I do think that you have underlying resentment and anger about things related to your DH and SS, and I think that has colored your reaction. When you are pissed at somebody about something, a small slight seems HUGE! So - if I were you I would figure out exactly what that is (like the car loan) and address that issue instead of masking it by being upset over a small slight.
You asked for opinions so that's mine. It's a different perspective than others but I hope you at least consider it. I think this was just a case of a bit of sniping. Unless your DH swears at you all the time, which I doubt is the case since this one incident has you so upset.