I am stepmother to a 14 yo girl. I've been her stepmother for over 10 years, so we are close. I live with her BF. She splits her time between BM and BF/our house. SD has been self-harming. Wouldn't talk to school counsellor. BF arranged private psychotherapy sessions for daughter, which she has started not to attend. She's at BM's house when the self-harm happens and when the therapy sessions are supposed to take place. BM not engaged with the therapist. SD is disengaged with school, gaining weight, unhappy and unhealthy. BM keen to find excuses for her, without addressing underlying mental health issues. BF has limited control of the situation, BM in denial/not sufficiently engaged. School thinks this is being handled privately. I'm really worried about my SD and don't know how to get birth parents to work togteher on this (they do not work well together on anything). It feels like it isnt my place to intervene (other than letting BF know my views, that he and SD have my support in whatever they need) but at the same time as I'm a big part of SD's life and have been since she was tiny, I feel very responsible and that I should do something. I have 3 teens of my own so I'm a parent myself, and I know how sometimes we don't want to admit the truth of situations but something as serious as this needs addressing. Does anyone have any suggestions for how I can help? I have suggested to BF that they may need some family therapy sessions - get it all on the table with the three of them at once. Any other ideas would be gratefully received. SD needs help and she's not getting enough right now; I'm really worried about her.