She Blantantly lied to the Guardian ad Litem
Long story short, BM filed for full custody just 3 months prior to me marrying her former husband. We have been together for nearly 4 years and shared parenting has been in place for 3 yrs. ( Yes, she tried getting full custody before, but she was denied ) This time during her filing, she requested a Guardian ad Litem, which was no surprise, as she has been "working" on my ss and brainwashing him to the point that we basically have no relationship anymore. ( At one point,this kid would request i take care of him while he was sick and his mom would gladly dump him off. She didn't like me, but she didn't want to deal with her ill child either )
We got the guardians report back. She proposes we continue with shared parenting ( what we asked for ) and the guardian even stated in the report that the BM's dislike for SM (me) is rubbing off on the oldest child and that he seems to share her same views. Thankfully though, the youngest child was honest and didn't take part in her lies.
Some of the things she lied about:
- paying half of the bills. She hasn't paid a dime in 4 yrs, not even school fees. No co-pays, no prescriptions, etc. We can prove this.
- I chased her down the road in my car ( WOW- NEVER EVER HAPPENED )
- My husband does not spend "quality time alone with his kids", my kids and I are always around. NOT TRUE. I have changed my work schedule and shared parenting time with MY EX HUSBAND to give my husband and his kids time together, without me or my kids around. I did this 3 times already and my oldest SS ASKED me to go back to the regular schedule because he had missed me and the other kids.
- I badmouth her while at ball games. ( I DON'T EVEN SIT NEAR HER, NOR DO I GO AROUND HER )
- She said she doesn't drink- YEAH RIGHT..she drinks enough for all of us!( We have pictures of her partying all the time )
- She said she doesn't date- Sure...this is why her son did a timeline project at school that even stated that he had met 5 of her boyfriends in the last year. ( He even wrote the report at her house but she NEVER took it out of his bag- what an idiot )
At any rate, this woman is clearly off her rocker and has done so much more in the last 4 years, But i guess my question is has anyone ever went through this where the other parent is narcissistic and a compulsive liar? I know we can prove her wrong in court but how much emphasis does the judge put on learning the truth after a guardian has been lied to? I am just wondering if the judge will realize that the guardian made their decision based on lies and not truths, perhaps, taking shared custody away from the mom, period? Your thoughts are greatly appreciated.
If the GAL is recommending
If the GAL is recommending that the current scheme be continued he's not going to change it unless something comes up in court to make him decide the GAL is wrong.
Any lies she tell the court either by testimony or petition can be countered by Dad so I would predict a ruling for the status quo.
I figured as much... I am not
I figured as much... I am not worried in the least that she will gain custody, I just want the truths to be known in court, which I know they will.
Last year, BM was told by the magistrate to start taking financial responsibility for the boys and that she had better not see her back in court...well, unfortunately for BM, she didn't take the advice seriously because the custody hearing will be ruled upon by that same magistrate that granted the shared parenting and gave her the verbal lashing. Perhaps it won't take much to show BM's true colors after all.
We have the same problems.
We have the same problems. Long story but crazy BM usually gets the Judge to remove DH 30 days. She keeps SD9 in counseling, she has been going since 5 claiming such anxiety that the child would be damaged to be away from BM for over 7 days. Funny though she is a regular kid at our house, spoiled as heck but no crying no worrying, talks non stop. BM claims at her house she get nervouse and anxiouse and stops talking when she know she is going to DH. Yet the kid favors her BD big time or at least used to unti BM started all this crap. DH always had her 50/50 through agreement with BM, he married me and it was all over. BM started the court battle and stops at nothing. Tried to have it where I couldn't be alone with SD, didn't work. BM is now claiming I call the Dr offices pose as her to try and get records, list goes on and on.....
Is it illegal to lie to a
Is it illegal to lie to a GAL?
My husband's ex is a compulsive liar, to the point of it being a mental illness. She lied in court and perjured herself on the stand where the judge stopped her from speaking. No one cared or cares, I am assuming that the courts/judges are used to being lied to and that it is part of the daily grind in the family court system.
It has not been our
It has not been our experience that the judge gives a shit. as a matter of fact, not only does he not care about her antics and he consequences to the kids, he actually...
Oh nevermind.
Good luck.
It isn't illegal to lie to a
It isn't illegal to lie to a GAL.
I am a GAL. The things you listed, even if they are all true and one hundred percent correct in your favor, do not rise to the level of a custody change.
-paying half of the bills. She hasn't paid a dime in 4 yrs, not even school fees. No co-pays, no prescriptions, etc. We can prove this.
This is not the purvue of a GAL nor of custody. Money and custody have zero intersection.
- I chased her down the road in my car ( WOW- NEVER EVER HAPPENED )
Irrelevant. You are not a party.
- My husband does not spend "quality time alone with his kids", my kids and I are always around. NOT TRUE. I have changed my work schedule and shared parenting time with MY EX HUSBAND to give my husband and his kids time together, without me or my kids around. I did this 3 times already and my oldest SS ASKED me to go back to the regular schedule because he had missed me and the other kids.
So husbands spends time with the kids, good. With or without you does not matter to a GAL. This is not going to lead to a change of custody unless husband isn't taking his time period.
- I badmouth her while at ball games. ( I DON'T EVEN SIT NEAR HER, NOR DO I GO AROUND HER )
You don't matter. You are not a party. If you badmouth her to the kids that will get a judge's warning.
- She said she doesn't drink- YEAH RIGHT..she drinks enough for all of us!( We have pictures of her partying all the time )
Irrelevant unless you have proof that this is with the kids present and rises to unfitness. I suspect the kids are not in those pictures. Drinking is legal unless it renders a parent unfit - a finding of the court, not an opinion of the other parent.
- She said she doesn't date- Sure...this is why her son did a timeline project at school that even stated that he had met 5 of her boyfriends in the last year. ( He even wrote the report at her house but she NEVER took it out of his bag- what an idiot )
She is allowed to date. Irrelevant (and btw, your hubby must have dated, also, or how did he get you?). Unless your SO's parenting plan spells out that she cannot bring any men around the children (and that will not likely survive constitutional scrutiny), she has done nothing that is going to warrant a custody change.
Be careful with the judge "doesn't give a shit" stuff. That's not going to work well for you or SO if you even begin to display that in court. None of the listed items provide even an approach to custody change on either side. Your GAL seems to have it right, and I predict her recommendations will be followed.