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One custody and one CS question

maybeonesoon's picture
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I actually have 2 questions, one regarding CS and the other regarding custody.
The first one regarding child support is: If my boyfriends soon to be ex-wife loses her job due to the place closing, can she go back to court and request more child support and/or alimony? Their divorce has not been finalized yet because she has been dragging her feet. He has 50/50 custody right now, and pays no alimony because their wages are comparable.
The second question: Has anyone had any luck in getting a higher custody percentage if the BM is causing problems with the children? I am not talking beating them or neglecting them, more on the psychological level. There have been many times now that when it is my B/F night, the 12y.o. will refuse to go with him, and she says its ok. Her defense is, "I didn't tell him that he couldn't go." But we know that she is telling the son it is OK to do this. I just want to know if there is any recourse for my boyfriend. She has also not gone to any of the court appointed "co-parenting" counseling that they were required to do. My boyfriend has done everything that he is supposed to do on his end. It just seems that she continues to get away with alot of BS and it doesn't seem right!!
Thanks

Serena's picture

In my state (MO), they can do a modification, but they will factor in her unemployment, housing assistance, TANF (temp assistance for needy families), etc. into her income (not food stamps tho). Where do you live?

As for reducing child support because she's a bad mom? No, they are two separate things and one has nothing to do with the other. Not unless you increase your custody. If you can prove that she's an abusive/neglectful mother you can get full custody and she'll have to pay support. But honestly, her telling the kids they don't have go to visitation is not abuse/neglect. It IS stupid, as that is court ordered and not her decision. If she refuses to allow to have the kids, you can take her to court for contempt, but just making a comment that she doesn't care if the kids miss visitation is something you can't do anything about. I'm sorry, I know it stinks when the kids get put in the middle like that.

Put your state out there and maybe someone from your state can better answer your child support question.

Angel's picture

Sweetie!!! He is a boyfriend and not quite divorced! Run! Run real fast. Let him finish raising those kids and let he and his X battle it out.

Go out, enjoy, live your life without worrying about someone else's children. You deserve the very best. Do yourself a favor.

smurfy1smile's picture

I agree run away.

But to answer the first question - alimony - no way. More child support, probably not.

FustratedStepmom's picture

You have to love him THOROUGHLY!! I have been dealing with this crap for a while. The ONLY reason I stay is that I have the best husband in the world!

livinthedream's picture

As for the first question, BM can take him back to court as much as she wants. Maybe your BF can be like my BF & not accept the paperwork when it is served? Moves from State to State! Hang in there if you really love him & make plenty of time for yourself to enjoy your life- cuz its a rough road

isthis4me's picture

She quit her job or got fired the day after she was served with our motion for less cs and more custody ect.
Does the court take into account that she has had a job making about the same for the last 4 years? I would have to think so or all people would lose their jobs when they know that there is a ccs hearing coming up....I hope the court system would not people play it that bad....we will see....