My husband has custody of my SS and BM gets visitations EOW. Just about every time she has him she calls and says that she doesn't want him anymore. He needs to come home because he doesn't listen to her. She puts him down talking about how stupid he is and how no one thinks he's normal or right in the head. He also comes home telling us about how BM told him that he can never go back over there, that if he calls and asks she will say no. She tells him that she used to like him when he was a baby but not anymore. She says she can't stand him because he's to wild and crazy. (He's not like that at our house. I mean once in a while because he's a 6 year old boy, but not how he is with her. He tells us he doesn't listen to her, and we always tell him how he needs to listen to her. We can't do any more than that to help her out.) But he came home and today was telling me how he's never allowed over there again. Told me all the names she calls him and how she doesn't like him anymore. He started tearing up saying he will miss her. I told him that he will see her again, and he fight and argues at it that she said he will never see her again.
She's not someone we can really talk to.. not even DH... she won't listen and yells and hangs up on us. So how can we fix this? I'm not worried about her but how can we reassure SS that he's not losing his mother. I hate seeing him get so emotional and worried when I know that when it's her visitation next, she will come and get him. Is there anything DH can do so that she can't say these kind of things to him? It's really damaging him. Does he have any legal rights? I'm just not sure how to handle it.

And she has told us certain weekends that she won't take him. She saw him for Christmas but didn't get him anything. She had him half of his birthday and didn't get him anything and didn't get a cake or anything. Then she had him for Easter and they did nothing again. Each time he came home sad. There are even weekends where she sends him home early because she "can't stand him".