My wonderful twin SK have turned 18 and graduated from school. Two days after their June 8th graduation the glorious letter showed up, no more CS!

DH and I had custody of the SK for 14 years, from ages 2 to 16. DH and BM divorced and custody was arranged so that neither DH or BM really had to pay CS because of how the overnites were allotted. We had them more often than BM but she had to pay relatively little CS and she had to maintain their health insurance. We never had the CS enforced and when she cried broke, we covered their health insurance for her. The only expenses we asked her to cover were their eyeglass every few years and clothes a few times a year. Do you know this B would ask us to cover those expenses too?

At 16, the SK were caught rumaging through and stealing from our bedroom. They were trying to get themselves "thrown out" so they could live with their BM but DH wasn't falling for that. He took away their internet priveleges. They decided that punishment was too harsh and wemt to their BM's and refused to come back. Fine. Well, not fine cause I was hurt and I cried, but we let them go.

Long story short, the SK went to school from our house but spent every weekend, holiday and several weeks during the summer with BM. She would call them every single day, twice or three or four times to remind them of how miserable they were living with us. I personally told her, on a number of occassions, if she really wanted them to get a lawyer and have the custody arrangement changed. Do you know this B never did it, but just expected us to simply turn them over to her all the while whining to the kids about how "they needed to be together". She really caused them a lot of pain and stress and heartache that was totally unneccesary. She made them feel guilty for enjoying their life with us and their siblings. We knew they enjoyed the family time at our home because it was so obvious, but whenever BM caught wind of it she found a way to put a damper on it. You'd think if she REALLY wanted her kids she would have gotten a lawyer and petitioned the court for custody. The truth is, she just wanted/needed the kids pining for her. I felt so bad for them that she left them feeling that way.

Well, my feeling is that she basically copped out of getting them on her terms through the court and brainwashed the kids into believing they were miserable because they couldn't go to school from her house. Then when they are 16 and enboldened by her constant insistent brainwashing, they ran away to her and she helped them. Our lawyer told us to let it go; by the time we would get the custody renegotiated the kids would be 18 and we'd be out some $25K. I cried because I lost MY children (SS & SD twins).

The BM didn't have them for 5 hot minutes before she filed for child support. We had NO means to support two households and at the time the support order came, I had just lost my job. I couldn't believe it but as it turned out, losing my job was a blessing. It gave me access to my 401K money that we used to pay BM $1100 a month. BM was so giddy to be getting that sum I think she soiled her pants.

I hope she got good and used to it because it's over! Done! Fine'! She got CS for all of 11 months total. SK will be going to college in the fall this year. I expect to get a call from her for money in Mid Aug or so. If she didn't make the kids get jobs, she will be told to pound sand. She doesn't believe they should work for anything, they should just be given everything. She parents from guilt, we don't.

Now, I just need to play catchup to get my finances back on track. If the kids need something, they are old enough to call us directly. I cannot wait to tell her arse to go pound sand.