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What do crazy BM's/BD"s think of us SM's/SD's

FTMandSM's picture

I was thinking yesterday how crazy my SO's BM is and thought, "Does she think I am crazy?"...It doesn't matter what she thinks but just curious. I bet she thinks I am. Only if i have ever spoken to her a handful, not even that many times. I get to see what she texts SO, so I know that she is bat shit cray. Just a food for thought.....

StepKat's picture

LOL I know BM hates me. She has actually told SD13 that I’m trying to take away her rights as a mother, that I don’t care about SS11’s allergies, that I don’t know what the f*** I’m doing when I treat SS9’s eczema (my mother is a nurse of 30 years, therefore, I do what she recommends and it works). All sorts of crap.

Tuff Noogies's picture

Stupid used to flip flop on this. "i dont know why tuff doesnt talk to me, i bet we could be real good friends"... then "tell your yankee bitch wife to shut her damn mouth".

nowadays, i doubt she thinks clearly enough to have an opinion of me anymore.

FTMandSM's picture

Hahaha you're a yankee bitch and I'm a southern cunt!! What difference does it make which region of the country we came from??

Tuff Noogies's picture

lol! people only resort to name calling when they have no valid ammo to use! she cant use anything else against me except that, since she knows nothing about me Wink

ETA- well she knows lots about me, but nothing she can use... what's she gonna do, call me a dumb "my job title"- she has no job! make fun of my car? hers was repo'd! she's got nothing to use, so she grasps at that one remaining straw that is totally irrelevant to anything! }:)

lil_lady's picture

Well I am a stupid retarded bitch... which goes over well with someone who has 3 brothers and sisters on the autism spectrum. I guess though I don't get to offended by it. She would have a hard time being politically correct because her schooling consists of highschool and of course a casual job for employment... much like the bm in your life. I on the other hand had 3 jobs at the time and am almost done my degree ontop of a secondary diploma.

Maybe they are just so threatened by us they change that feeling into us being psychotic...

FTMandSM's picture

I love how they come up with all these lies and actually believe them. BM hates me too. She has threatened SO that she will go to her lawyer so SD can't be around me (for god knows what reason she has come up with in her mind). And as long as we are together she will keep SD away. Hmmmm jealous much..LOL!!

How can you take away her rights..LMAO!!!

Goincrazy40's picture

I don't think my crazy BM thinks I am crazy … I obviously am not. I have a great career and run my life like an adult. I mean, I get up and go to work everyday. And my kids (er her kids) didn't ask to go live with their father because their mother was a lazy, abusive, hoarder, uncaring person.

But I do know for sure that she hates my guts!

hereiam's picture

I used to be "that bitch that stole your dad from me" (not true, the stealing part).

Now, 17 years later, she tells everybody that she feels sorry for me (for being with DH).

DH thinks she has always been intimidated by me, which is fine as it kept her somewhat in line. She thinks she is smart but she has found out over the years, that I am smarter.

StepKat's picture

Oh! I MUST share this. The first time I went with DH to drop with skids off to BM, her true idiot and hateful colors showed. BM had called DH while we were on our way to get his location. The skids were being rather loud in the back so I turn around I calming tell them that “Your dad is on the phone with your mom. So lets tone it down a bit.” I said this in a sweet voice and with a big smile. The skids smiled back and stopped the noise. Next thing I hear is BM through the phone, screaming at DH. She was throwing a huge bitch fit because she said I was yelling at her kids to shut up. It’s a small car so I guess she heard me over the phone asking the kids to quiet down. OMG DH went off on her ass because I didn’t yell at the kids. When we arrived at the drop out it was like WWIII broke out.

FTMandSM's picture

God you are sooo evil for telling HER kids to shut up...lol. I have a similar story..When SD was 2 she went through a hitting phase, like most children, no big deal, we all just hav eto keep reminding her that it's not the nice thing to do blah blah blah..Well when BM came to pick up SD, SD said something like "daddy yelled at me" or what ever. BM said "well we will just have to beat daddy up." REALLY???? She keeps hitting people...any way I say calmly, "Oh no no, we don't like to hit do we?" Well, a few hours later in a text to SO of course cause BM can't say anything to your face, "Your GF better not ever undermind me in front of my daughter again. She's a cunt and not a mother so she has not idea that me and SD were only joking." I'm sorry, I didn't realize that a 2yr old can determine what is a joke and what isn't. Good job teaching YOUR daughter to beat people up. Oh and SD would always come over saying "I'm going to punch you in the nose." and "If you don't be quiet, I'm going to beat you."

zerostepdrama's picture

I'm sure BM thinks I am crazy since I dont like her kids. LOL. She has said some nasty things about me and told DH I am by far the worse woman he has been with and the most crazy. Crazy because I dont put up with your b.s. and the kids b.s.? Well call me crazy then.

I could care less what she thinks about me. I know there is some jealousy there too as I have out exceeded her in every aspect of life.

I am a SD and I sometimes think about how my step sisters felt growing up. As I lived with their dad and he was the main "man" in my home. He was like a dad. I wonder if they were jealous. However they had a step dad too and that was more their "main" family.

I have a SM and sometimes I read stories of SM's complaining about the girl skids and just the idiotic stuff they say and I think Oh I have probably said those things. I wonder if my SM ever thought I was an idiot or brat. But I have a good relationship with my SM and care for her deeply. No issues that I am aware of.

However I know I do read some stories on here and think the SM is just as crazy and high conflict as BM and the skids.

Patsy's picture

I doubt she even thinks about me. I am disposable to her. She will never see that I love and care for her child. I think she feels I have no baring in her daughters life. I hate to admit it but I am sure I spend more time hating her than she even bothers to think about me one way or the other. She is a narcissist and only thinks about herself.

over_the_rainbow's picture

BM hates me. The feeling is mutual, in fact I probably hate that crazy bitch more than she hates me because I've seen the damage she has done to her kid. We have no contact with each other. Fine with me - SD loves me, and has told me that I'm pretty much the only mom she has anymore (even though BM has EOWE visitation, she spends no time with her kid). I feel really bad for SD, I know it has to be hard on her and very painful to deal with, but I can't help but think SUCK IT BM, I'm a REAL mom! (I know that's petty and I sound like a bitch, but I'm being honest.)

EvilWickedSM's picture

I'm not really sure what BM thinks about me. If she's ever said anything to DH he is smart enough to not relay the message to me, lol. He knows better than that, I hope Smile I do know, however, that BM cannot stand it when SD and I are getting along. She always does something, something not too obvious, of course, to put a halt to that. That's okay...if she's a crappy mom and doesn't appreciate the fact that her DD had one more person in her life who cared about her and the person she becomes, that's all on her.

girlmeetsworld714's picture

BM says I'm psycho all the time. She says that I'm the only one in SO's family that cares about SD3 even though it's "borderline obsession" (she claims SO and his entire family doesn't care about SD and when they post pictures or something on facebook, it's because they're just pretending to care). Lol I haven't even seen SD in almost two years but she says that I "cross lines" with her and all this stuff. I run a daycare so her accusations really aren't funny, but they're so pathetic I can't help but laugh at them. What really sucks though is that I can't do anything with the police to keep her from trying to ruin my reputation until it actually starts to affect things. Go figure.

SituationalTourettes's picture

Interesting question. Was thinking about that myself the other day.

I am a BM as well as a soon to be official SM. I was actually fine with my kids' stepmom until she lost her mind over a family fight w my ex-family (didnt involve me and my kids) and began demanding that I stop my kids ON MY TIME from seeing my ex husb's family. Uh, sorry, no, they havent done anything to me and my family is all out of state. My kids have grown up with their cousins like brothers and sisters and there was no way in hell I was going to keep them from the only extended family they have left (my parents are deceased). I was a bitch in her opinion after that and she started taking out her frustrations with my wuss ex (he also owed me money for the kids so I had to take him to court when he chose to buy a house instead of paying me back) on my kids esp my autistic spectrum son. That's when I snapped and went into BM from hell mode on her. I did however demand my kids continue to treat her with respect and civility. To this day my son still has psychological scars from the bs his father and SM put him through.

As a future SM, my SO's exwife hates my guts and I could care less. The only thing that pisses me off is lack of acknowledgement for what I do for her kids. She's a cowardly bitch who can't even look me in the eye or take me on to my face. I really dont care what she thinks of me.

FTMandSM's picture

Just a question....have you been "nice" to the SM? the reason why I ask is my SO's BM always talks shit about me (and now my son) to him and has since day one of dating. I know that she is going to talk shit, but to SO is a different story. So the one time I stand up for myself,I'm the crazy one.

I agree with you in the above situation. Even as a new SM, I would never try to keep kids away from their grandparents, cousins, etc...it's their family and they should be able to see them. One Rule, don't talk about peoples kids to their face or any of their family members, she's an iddiot for doing this. That's what the internet is for Blum 3

Edit: ok maybe not nice but civil. I have tried to be civil and it doesn't get me anywhere. 99.9% of the time, I ignore her.

SituationalTourettes's picture

I was actually happy my exhusb was dating. I had asked for divorce and he's a good guy just a bit codependent. We basically faded to friends and roommates than lovers sort of thing. I got along with SM in the beginning. She was a bio teacher and had kids of her own. My kids liked her in the beginning but they were a bit concerned because she drinks a lot of wine. I don't think she's an alcoholic or anything but my kids arent used to that - I don't drink. When she is downing two to three bottles a weekend and they see lots of beer bottles in garbage, they were a little like wha--? Their dad rarely drinks too. Anyway, she was fine and we got along well. I was very very specific to my kids that they be respectful and if anything bothered them with her or their dad they owed it to them to very nicely say something and work it out. I reminded them that I had limited control over things and they needed to talk to their dad first if anything bothered them. I was eager to have an SM in my kids lives that loved them and would care for them. It all fell apart with the goings on with his family. I truly did try being nice to her in the beginning but there were cracks in the marriage to begin with including they dated for 6 months (first one he dated after breakup too), got engaged and married about 7 to 8 months after that. Then suddenly they are buying a house. It was very quick and she wanted a fairy tale but didnt realize that when you marry someone, YOU MARRY THEIR FAMILY TOO WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT. Add the fact that my ex kept certain financial things from her and you have a train wreck.

If she hadn't have started treating my son like shit and insulting him by calling him passive agressive, MAKING THE KID SLEEP ON THE FLOOR AFTER HE'D ALREADY BEEN GIVEN A SPACE IN A BEDROOM, denying him access to his family, and continually bashing me in front of him, I wouldnt have gotten involved. I told her and my ex flat out, Hey, take out a public billboard on a major highway about what a bitch you think I am. I'll get a t-shirt saying I am. I'm a big girl - i can take insults. Just don't do it in front of my special needs son. And of course his father was too much of a pussy to stop her from slamming me in front of the kid which of course didnt exactly raise my son's estimation of his dad any.

SMof2Girls's picture

She thinks I'm jealous of her. She thinks that I don't a single thing about parenting, or caring for children in any sense whatsoever. She thinks I stole her husband from her and destroyed her marriage. She also thinks I care about what she thinks of me.

EvilWickedSM's picture

Since I see others are posting as BMs too, I’ll join in. As a BM I think DD’s SM is crazy and a tramp. She has 2 kids with 2 fathers, both of which were one night stands. She has been pregnant at least three other times by three other men (or has at least told these men that she was pregnant) and had miscarriages. This info comes directly from each of these other men. She has repeatedly talked badly about me in front of DD, points out every little thing that she thinks I should do differently, has her kids convinced that I am evil, and insists upon stirring the pot that has remained calm for the past 7 years. In return I have insisted that DD treat her SM with the same respect she would show me or her dad, when DD complains about SM and her kids I have informed her that they are part of her family now and that Daddy loves them, etc. I have even taken her side when exH does stupid typical Disney Dad stuff. But, somehow I am still the evil witch…lol. As I said, she’s crazy.

HungryEyes's picture

Bm says we have a mutual respect for each other. And I would say that's accurate but we always have our guard up. She hated me at first and so then I really disliked her and she let go of it and It took me longer to patch up those hurt feelings so now we don't communicate or get involved with each other and it's true what they say - disengagement is best.

ocs's picture

Mine speaks in tongues and is so batshit, I don't think she even has enough brain to decipher what I'm all about. She does hate me though. }:)

But this is what she sees,
1. SD used to enjoy her time with me- BM put a stop to it. It is a now a situation where DH sees SD without me. Boooohoooooo.... yeah I'm so upset that I can lunch and massage instead of dealing with your hot mess offspring. (she thinks she's punishing me)
2. we vacation nice places and she freaks that DH should pay more CS. Ummmmm- get a job.
3. I drive a nice car. Ummmm- get a job. or a license. i dunno- learn to read.
4. we live in a great neighborhood in a nice house. Ummmmm- get a job. (see the theme here?)

She has 3 children with 2 men, (SD14 is with my DH), the other 2 kids are with a different guy who also has 3 kids with 2 other women. (so between them? 6 kids, 5 bioparents- american dream right there)

BM thinks I'm a bitch and that since I came along, her gravy train stopped. Damn right. I gave DH the support he needed to understand the intense guilt and manipulation she fed him. I was also the first one to have zero tolerance and call the police at first strike.

christinen's picture

Hahaha. I don't think BM thinks I'm crazy but she sure does hate me! She has no job, no education, no house (lives with her mom), no car, 3 kids by 3 different men & never married to any of them. I have a nice house, a marriage, a career, a decent car, and a masters degree. She's extremely jealous and insecure and resorts to name calling ("dumbass cunt wife" seems to be her favorite lol) because she has nothing else she can say about me.

Rags's picture

My Skid's Sperm Idiot and the Sperm Clan in general think that my bride and I are mean, vindictive people who infringe on their pitty party lives and make them do things they do not want to do .... like pay CS for my Skid, and not let them do things that they want to do like not return him after visitation, take his nice quality clothing and return cheap crap, etc......

Reality is that we hold them accountable for their actions and for their responsibilities to our son and we don't give a flying fuck what they think.

Sadly, we can only protect our son from their pathetic crap. The three younger also out of wedlock Sperm Idiot spawn by two more baby mamas are fully exposed to the shallow and polluted end of their gene pool.

Our son has been raised to recognize the crap associated with the shallow and polluted end of his gene pool and is well armed from an intellectual and character perspective to protect himself from it.

Harleygurl's picture

BM has pure jealousy for me EXCEPT when my presence will serve her purpose in whatever crazy hairbrained idea she has. I've been equally told to stay out of SS7's life and to not do anything (although he lives in my house half the time and I will be damned if I let him destroy my house like he and his siblings do hers) to "Isn't he lucky to have two mommies and two daddies?" The later is usually said when she wants something to go her way and she knows DH is going to listen to me if I support her idea which is rare or not at all because her ideas are so incredibly stupid that it takes all I have to not say outloud "Are you really this stupid? Lazy? Out of your flipping mind?"

I have everything she wants to have handed to her (house, nice car, good job, stability) and it drives her nuts that DH and her son are a part of what I have. Hey dipshit! It's called working! Not collecting food stamps, welfare checks, and any other form of assistance known to mankind. It's called a job! You might want to try it out sometime instead of sticking with your career of getting knocked up.

QueenBeau's picture

I bet BM thinks:

"Queen doesn't want to be my friend & idk why" even though it's because she disrespected me multiple times, still disrespects DH & MIL, & always puts her feelings before SDs.

& "Queen doesn't think I'm a good mom even though I'm a GREAT mother" even though she's a shitty mother who always puts her emotional needs before SD6s.

I figure this because lately when her & DH get into 'arguments' (which is really him trying to tell BM something about SD, & BM starting to yell like a maniac) she says things like "WELL I AM STILL HER BIOLOGICAL MOM EVEN THOUGH NOBODY THINKS I DO ANYTHING RIGHT"

Little does she know, I don't talk to her because she is annoying as f*ck - not because she is a terrible human being.

krich1990's picture

ha yall have nothing on mine. my husband dated birthmom for 2 months, literally. she disappeared with another guy, pops up when shes about 8 months pregnant to let my husband know shes pregnant but shes pretty sure its the guys she was with last. That guy did a dna test, came back negative. the baby was already 3 months old by now, my husband did a test came back positive. that month after my husband got temporary custody because her kids were taken by cps for meth use.
Weve had DS for over a year now. Hes been doing great, shes seen him a total of 28 times for an hour, because she cant seem to stay longer than that.
She hates me! from the day my husband found out the child was his she thought they would be together. she told my husband it was good I had a miscarriage because I didn't need to get fat anyways. I have been told I stole her kid because im jealous I don't have one. im pregnant now and she talks shit about that too. Im crazy, manipulative, and apparently my husband is so stupid that anything he says or does I MUST have written it down and forced him to say it. I seriously don't even know what is wrong with this woman, other than she does drugs all the time.
She tells me and my husband were shitty for what we do, even though all we do is take extremely good care of the baby. Its really quite sad that what we do gets no appreciation from her.
she tells people we stole her son and shes trying to get him back. That we leave him in shitty diapers, we neglect him by making him go to bed at 630 pm, we spoil him by buying him nice things. seriously?????j
cps comes to our home 2 times a month to check on him and have never found one thing wrong.

not2sureimsaneanymore's picture

She thinks I'm "dumb as a sack of hammers" and "have the body of a 12 year old boy."

If I'm that stupid then I wonder what that makes her. At least I never cheated on my SO (and almost fiance who was going to propose) and got pregnant by the guy I cheated with on purpose so said guy would marry her. Got too much self respect for that.

And if I have the body of a 12 year old boy (a dig at the fact that I'm asian) what does that say about her if DH would rather be with me?

Eh, they dig their own graves with their stupidity.