We have lots of problems with my SD12. Our main problems are that she doesn't respect anyone, care about anyone but herself, or follow our rules. She also lies with the best of them. We have her 24/7 (her mom abandoned her).

Here is her latest: She got caught sneaking behind a shed at school to kiss a boy and got a detention for it. She had detention last week, too (for walking out of gym class early without permission). She is not even allowed to have a boyfriend. She told me a month ago when we had a mother/daughter talk, that she didn't want to kiss a boy until she got engaged. That was obviously a lie, but also perhaps mocking me because I have high morals. I don't expect her to be me, I just expect her NOT to be the school slut! But she apparently is because she has repeatedly gotten in trouble at school for various types of physical contact with boys...starting in 4th grade. The school counselor told us this is NOT normal behavior.

I was a "true love waits" girl, and now I have a "school slut" for a SD. That is really hard for me as I see it as a reflection on me. We live in the town I grew up in, she goes to my old school. I never had a detention and she has had 2 in the first 8 wks of school! We just don't know how to get through to her. We have tried three counselors...first was a joke, second sent her somewhere else and third wouldn't see her bc she doesn't need medicated.

I think military school would help "wake her up" and teach her to respect her elders...but there aren't any that I can find for 12 year olds. She has about 10-15 minutes of chores to do per day (and if she doesn't do then, she doesn't go to dance practice. So far this is working). We have taken away her social life since she has had repeated offenses with boys. Meaning no dances, no phone calls, etc. As punishment for kissing a boy we are considering making her detail our cars...one of which is pretty dirty partially thanks to her.

I just don't know how to get her under control? Is it even possible? Do we just keep punishing and accept that it won't change her behavior? I had just told her how proud of her I was for her good attitude...and then yet another phone call from the school shortly after.