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ugh! if its noy the kids irritating me, tben its the moms.

202stepmom's picture

Submitted by 202stepmom on Fri, 02/22/2013 - 9:16pm

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General Discussion

:? Me and my fiance got married a couple weeks ago, we have bern together for
For 4 years now. Everything is always good with us, until his kids comd over
Or one of they moms call. I dont know if this is really what i want to deal with
I have two children and my children dad and.him get along great.

fedup13's picture

Submitted by fedup13 on Fri, 02/22/2013 - 9:26pm

Yep, I went into a marriage too and now, due to skid and BM, I question my sanity on a regular basis. Not the life I envisioned for myself at all.

202stepmom's picture

Submitted by 202stepmom on Fri, 02/22/2013 - 9:35pm

Smh

giveitago's picture

Submitted by giveitago on Sat, 02/23/2013 - 4:08am

It's a sad reality but the bio parents have to communicate somehow, regarding child support and access etc. SKids were 10 (twins) when I met them, they are now 19. I made it quite clear to DH that there is no need for any contact whatsoever with BM now that the SKids are grown, he honors that. Occasionally she'll ring the phone off the hook but DH does not answer it. What DH says, when he sees certain numbers displayed, is 'I just know (whomever) isn't calling me with something I want or need. Occasionally BM will call from another number and DH accidentally answers it. He just says 'cant talk right now' and hangs up. To a deranged mind that's still a 'victory' though. It's hard, almost impossible, to accept but, if she's anything like BM here, the woman probably just wants to piss you off royally and if she sees that happening then she actually believes she's winning. I flat out disengaged from her as well as the SKids. She knows better than to even try to speak to me.

christinen's picture

Submitted by christinen on Sat, 02/23/2013 - 10:34am

I actually just posted something similar in the blended families forum.

DH has SD 50/50 and the weeks without her we are absolutely great! We never argue, we get along great, we actually have a lot of fun together.

Then SD comes and everything is completely different. She just annoys the shit out of me. Everything revolves around her. It's like she's on a damn vacation every time she comes over thanks to Disney Dad. She came back last night, and already they have made cupcakes and went and got her a Build A Bear.

I never imagined in my wildest dreams this is the life I would be living.

fedup13's picture

Submitted by fedup13 on Sat, 02/23/2013 - 3:25pm

Same here Christinen. It used to be anyway, for a long time, things were pretty good as long as skid was not here. When he was, it was a totally different story. EVERYTHING revolved around skid and DH was a Disneyland Daddy extraordinaire. I too never ever imagined that I would live that kind of life. Now, as more time has passed, things are not even good when skid is gone, because there is so much grief, pain, anger, and resentment. I have disengaged from BM and skid, but skid is still here on DH's time when DH is not at work. (I no longer allow him to be in this home if DH is not here, he goes to MIL's when it is DH's time and DH works), which has helped and hurt. Helped me stay somewhat sane, but just makes DH resent me because in his eyes, I am the reason his precious little baby is not here as much as he should be.

christinen's picture

Submitted by christinen on Sat, 02/23/2013 - 6:10pm

I know what you're saying, fedup. DH doesn't understand why I don't want skid around. I have tried explaining to him more times than I can count that it's not only her that bothers me, it's the way he completely changes as soon as she walks through the door.

fedup13's picture

Submitted by fedup13 on Sat, 02/23/2013 - 6:17pm

Yeah, my DH morphs into a totally different person and it is not someone I like at all. Then, by the time it is time for skid to leave and go back to BM, he has ran himself totally ragged trying to please this kid, spent thurs-sun being completely ran over by this kid, Disneyland Daddy'd himself into a frazzled jerk, so he bites my head off every time I turn around, even try to touch him, because his nerves are shot, so I get hurt, get mad, tension abounds, we may get a day or so of decency, but then, THURSDAYS HERE AGAIN!!! and it is all shot right back to hell.

christinen's picture

Submitted by christinen on Sat, 02/23/2013 - 6:08pm

I-m so happy That's what I'm thinking, stepmomma! I only have 1 SD and it's bad enough! Can't imagine there being any more of them! Especially with more BMs.. Dear God..