Skids were in the wedding as ring bearer and mini groom. They stayed until around 8 or 8:30 and then went with my in laws. They were only 5 at the time. I'm sure when bm gets married, the whole ceremony will revolve around them. I can totally see bm's fiancé doing some sort of gag worthy promise vow during the wedding to promise to take them to be his step kids or something. He already included them in the proposal

LOL... oh god- BM tried to make it a gong show.

Our was a destination wedding, so MUCHO planning involved. SD was 12 at the time and I made her a 'junior' bridesmaid. I only had my best friend as maid of honour, and SD in the wedding party.

Small things that BM did to annoy me:
1. rush to marry her baby daddy of the day, (we later found out it was 'symbolic') just before ours- it made some shopping for SD impossible. I was not leaving SD's wardrobe up to chance in front of my family.

2. after SD showed her a pic of how I was thinking her hair would look cute, butchered SD's hair into an ugly shag. Couldn't do a damn thing with it in Caribbean humidity. She looked like cousin It. (SD was excited to be going to get her hair done in a fancy resort, so I thought it would be ok to share .... NOT)

3. called the resort EVERY day and tried to cause drama

I'm super glad to this day there are pictures SD is not in. My inlaws more or less kept her away from me, but I really had to make an effort to zen out with her there.

Moving forward, I would still have involved SD since it made DH happy, but would have kept all details on lockdown, so BM couldn't bug me.

Hi Mikhaila My partner has insisted that we go abroad if / when we get married (think he wants to avoid the whole formal ceremony thing and do something completely different to what he did with his ex which is fair enough). Anyway I have told him, if that is the case, the skids CANNOT come with us. He obviously wasn't happy about this saying he couldn't imagine them not being present at his wedding but I offered him an alternative - we get married at home, the skids attend and his in-laws take them home early evening. He then argued that his in-laws would look after them and could take them "home" (back to the apartment or whatever) if we did it abroad. At this point I made it clear that it would ruin it for me and I would sooner not do it at all! The thing is, the skids wouldn't understand that it was not a holiday for them but that it was dad and SM's big day (plus honeymoon incorporated). They would be wanting to be constantly entertained, go to the waterpark and do kid stuff. Plus even if his in-laws where there to look after them, he is their dad at the end of the day and they would naturally gravitate towards him whinging "daddy I want an ice-cream!". No thanks

He can't really argue with that as I've offered him a compromise.

We got married in Vegas without telling anyone beforehand, so SD (3 at the time) was not at the wedding.

After my husband told BM that we had gotten married, she lectured him via text and email about how important it was to include your children in your wedding, how SD would be the center of attention at BM's wedding (that still hasn't happened), how SD was heartbroken that she wasn't at our wedding, etc. BM is so full of crap.

The (former) skids were at our wedding. A judge had to force BM to let them come. BS (then 16) walked me down the aisle. We asked SS1 (then 13) if he wanted to have a part. He said no, so he just attended. SS2 (then passed out the programs. It was a good day, no meltdowns. SS8 started to throw a fit when he found out he wasn't sitting at the table of his choice, but my sister (bless her heart!) but the kibosh on that real quick and we didn't even know about it till she told us about it later. This was when we were still trying to do the blended family thing, so it was nice at the time that they were there. Now? Eh, I'd rather not see them in our wedding pictures but oh well. There they are.

No friggin way was I getting married with skids present--they were teens at the time and would do anything for mommy so if we would have told them or included them there would have been no way to tell whether they would behave or not. Now at 23 and 24 we would probably have included them but back then they were angry teens. So like others have commented we had a quiet ceremony then a party with everyone on the return and they were invited to the reception party. I think it is wise to just be aware that when people/children are hurt over a divorce they will do some pretty silly things and they are presented with an easy target in their step parents. So knowing this I minimize any opportunities to cause me hurt or pain.

We had a destination wedding, and the SDs were bridesmaids. They weren't really little though - 16, 14, and 11 at the time. I didn't want *really* little ones at the wedding, so we just made a "no kids under the age of 10" rule. (My sister got a babysitter for my one year old nephew, in fact. I meant NO kids! *lol*)

DH's sisters were put in charge of the skids as soon as the reception started. They had cousins there, and all the kids had a ball together and didn't bug either DH or me. My SILs got the kids back to the hotel and into their room, and the next day the SDs went with them to the airport and they flew back home together while DH and I stayed and enjoyed our honeymoon. (BM picked them up at the airport.) It was fine, no issues, no drama. (At least not with the SDs or BM. Certain OTHER people tried to cause drama, but I think that probably happens at ALL weddings! *lol*)

We had a great wedding. I can't tell you how many people STILL ask us to do it again in a "renew your vows" ceremony at 10 years!

SD wont be at our wedding, we are having a destination wedding, including honeymoon. My fiance said straight away SD wont be there, hes happy to have no guests at all.

My husband and I met and a year later he purposes. I met his kid after he purposed. I planned a year and included skid and she insisted that her half sister help. This was my first time dealing with anything like this. BM was Coregel and she asked if she could come to help with the girls. I didn't see it being a big deal. After the wedding we had our first dance and then food in the building next to the church. People said they noticed the looks on BM face which later made the kids hurt because their mother. If you do have the skids , do not allow the BM ir any x's come. What a disaster! My sd was so young she remembers singing and having fun. She does not remember her BM but her oldest sister does and reminds her constantly. We had our honeymoon without any kids. My sd that was so young stold our honeymoon pictures as some of her own. I guess that's the traits of a mini wife pretending she was present at our honeymoon . And I would like to add, that oldest one tried to ruin my event. I paid all that money for their dresses and she wrinkled the dress so bad it looks crappy in all my pictures. She didn't even want her hair done,bitch! She later confessed to DH for giving me a hard time because she wasn't ready for him To move on She said. It's ok, she knows I do not like her over here nor do I buy her stuff because of her crappy attitude towards me. Screw that!