I need advice on how to cope with our SS's return to our house.

Background: DFH and I have been together 4 years. He has a S18 who lives with us full time (he's a full time college student), a D15 who lives with her mom full time, and a S11 that lives with us 50% of the time. My S10 lives with us 100%. BM got an ex parte order for temp full custody and accused us of emotionally abusing SS11.

All three skids lived with us 50/50 for 3 years. BM has been institutionalized and has a family history of mental and sexual abuse. She started her campaign to alientate the kids from day one. I met my DH long after thier divorce was final and was his second girlfriend, so there was no reason for the hate. From the begining, her erratic behavior worried me. I have a book to write on everything she has done!

Fast forward to today: SS18 was not corrupted by PAS and was kicked out by BM. She told him "you are too much like your father, I can't stand having you around". How handy that she waited until he was no longer counted for child support. SD15 seems to absolutely hate her father. It's so sad. The PAS was so bad that she has told the oldest son that her dad was just a liar and manipulator. Youngest SS has always been caught in the middle, poor guy. PAS has started to work on him, but we have hope because the courts saw right into it! Both SS11 and SD15 wrote these horrible letters to the court saying absolutely crushing things about my DH that were absolutely untrue.

The court case was decided yesterday. BM accused DH and I of mentally abusing SS10 and not feeding him. Filed a complaint with CPS. All children were interviewed by CPS and the mediator. BM was repremanded by CPS and the court for making false accusations. SS11 actually told the mediator that he wanted to spend MORE time with his dad. The mediator asked the BM why the kids were using her words in everything. Anyway, SD is going to mother's full time, and SS11 is the same, here 50%. He is coming back on Friday. I stay at home with both boys durning the summer as my DH works and I am a full-time student as well.

Here is where I need help. After all these horrible things have been thrown around, how do I cope? Just pretend like nothing happened? Get him a card that says my son and I missed him? I'm just struggling with how to act. The court ordered counseling for everyone. I hope it helps.

What can I do as a SM to make sure I protect myself and try to get back to "normal"?