Same garbage different bag
I am so done with all of this. I've been posting specific instances looking for feedback or suggestions but I've realized it's basically all the same trash, just in different bags.
Biomom is so deseparate for something to be wrong with SD so she can use it to excuse her abysmal parenting on and drug up her daughter. I think SD has a genuine case of Munchausen syndrome. When I met SD, BM thought she was deaf, a few months later it was Asperger's, then anaphylactic bee allergy, then back to Asperger's, then assessment done (bye bye money) which confirmed no Asperger's (horrors), then she thought she could communicate with / see ghosts, then got a separation anxiety disorder diagnosis, ignored it, then hellbent on Asperger's again (new therapist, more $, new diagnosis)again, no Asperger's but squeaked out an ADHD diagnosis after cheating the parent rating scales, now wants SD drugged up to her eyeballs on stimulants (ignoring the fact the daughter is anxious....hmmm I wonder why....) not to mention SD is doing fine in school.
The BM is a bully bigwig with a job that would get her bonus points for having a special needs child. I just hate this.
My DH is asking her to be cautious about medicating SD and BM coming over the top rope accusing him of stonewalling the process and denying his daughter support she is "desperately asking for" (the counsellor and SD did a self assessment for ADHD? SD is 8, is this normal, wtf is happening at this circus). BM is a bully, there is no point talking to her. We don't want to get lawyers involved because we are pinched.
Does anyone have any long term coping strategies for chronic liars who are also bullies and probably effing up the children they brought into the world? Not necessarily strategies to deal with these psychos directly but how to deal with the fact I decided to tow this dumpster fire into my front lawn when I got married. How do you all deal with the horror and dread of getting into this situation. Funny answers preferred, but helpful answers appreciated.
We have dealt with
We have dealt with Munchhausen by proxy for years. I swear BM defined her self worth on having a kid with issues. It was so ridiculous. We tried to fight things in court but "mother knows best". We showed proof, second opinions, doctor hopping histories, changing stories, lying on family history, etc- none of it mattered. All we did was waste time, money and energy. My SS is 18 now, we gave up the fight when we was about 16. We told him that he was going to have to advocate for himself, that if he wants to do a lot of things in life he needs his medical record clear of these fake ailments. He told us that he understands, but we have no idea what happened. He doesn't speak to us anymore. We are the villains in his story.
SD24 and SD17
Both Feral Forger SD24 and Powersulk SD17 have been to multiple drs and FF has been to ER more times than Ive been anywhere.
First it was anxiety (=medications) then it was heart palpitations (=dr visits and meds), then it was asthma (more meds).
NOW its lupus imaginaria. Its always something, or they wouldnt feel special.
Lupus Imaginaria LMFAOOOOO
Lupus Imaginaria LMFAOOOOO That cracks me up every time I see it.
In our case, BM has what DH calls "Fibromyassgia." It worked. It got BM out of working as of 20 years ago.
Lol - "Fibromyassgia."
My brother's MIL has "Figmyimagia". He coined that term during the very long drawn out drama fest when she self Dx'd with fibromialgia.
She dragged her DH all over with forced moves to get to locations where some wack job she read about said improved fibromialgia. A decade+ later, they are back where they started.
Reality is that she hates her very wealthy DH #2 and was trying to get him to stay behind so she could enjoy his money without suffering his presence. They are both now in their mid 80s and apparently she has resigned herself to suffering his presence.
SD17 Powersulk
now things its fybromyassia, but doesnt know and husband was supposed to take her to stanford for tests...
Goes along with Pretendinitis
Goes along with Pretendinitis.
Lol
Good one.
IMHO, these people make a ton of money for the health care
industry. Though they do reduce supply of care for those who legitimately need it, which under basic supply/demand models drives up cost.
Very similar to the education industry. Drop outs who carry a ton of school loans pay a huge % of the overheads for colleges/universities. Unfortunately they consume supply driving up total costs including for those legitimately seeking an education.
Ideally, those not legitimately needing care or an education should be penalized with a much higher % of the costs offsetting cost for those actively in need of care of actively seeking the education.
Just my thoughts of course.
I agree, and I know my way
I agree, and I know my way around the internet enough to be able to find evidence that - in the case of meds- the harms outweigh the benefits in a lot of cases at the individual level, at the societal level we are all paying the price, in Canada at least where our taxes pay for Wendy Wiggles-in-her-chair to be turned into a zombie lest the parents have to ..ahem...parent
Lollllll this post made me
Lollllll this post made me chuckle
My former coworker would
My former coworker would constantly say "I have a special needs child!!" when asked to do anything. The kid was a little goofy (shy and a little awkward), but nothing was actually wrong with him. She tried and tried to get a diagnosis but the best they did was ADD. She insisted he be in Special Ed, even though the teachers all said he didn't belong there. I think that if she couldn't have a genius or "gifted" child, the next best thing for attention was "special needs."
What's wrong with these
What's wrong with these parents? Did they not get enough attention growing up? Or do they not understand that children are children? Genuinely baffled
The kid excuse is always present in any workforce that has
breeders in it.
I have run organizations that were split between two end of week schedules both working compressed work weeks. 12hr days in a front half/back half schedule. FH works Sun-Tues and alternating Wed. BH works Thu-Sat and althernating Wed.
There has been the eternal "I have kids I need to have every Fri/Sat off" and the "I am single and I need every Fri/Sat off for my social life." Two different companies two decades apart and the whining has not changed.
I always have responded with ..."Your choice to marry and have kids, or not, is your choice. You are assigned a shift based on the needs of the business. The offer letter you signed clearly stated shift work was required and you agreed that there were no shifts you were not able to work."
Of course I did what I could to coordinate shift movement for anyone with an actual life change event and to find someone on the opposite shift who wanted or would agree to a swap.
I get that family comes first, it does for me too, but.... as a business leader I also know that not all life events can be accomodated. That is what prior notice PTO requests are for, and for true emergencies, that is what sick time if for. The onus is on the individual to manage their PTO and Sick time.
Special needs of not, accomodating those time demands are on the individual, not the business.
There is likely no secret why this individual is your "former" coworker.