Need Advice/Suggestions
Forums:
Please bear with me (1st post). FH & I have been dating several years. I have 11yo son, he has 9 & 13 yo sons. We are getting married soon, but have not told any of the kids the actual date. Long story short -- if BM knew the date then she would use it against FH. The kids would be sick, or not want to go, etc. We both agreed not to tell any of the kids -- I hate to lie to them/hide this from them, but I know how much it will mean for ss to be at the wedding for FH (and me). Are we crazy? The kids all know we are getting married and are fine with it (so far).
Don't tell anyone (skids)
Don't tell anyone (skids) till day of the wedding. Tell them you're getting married soon, all happy and good stuff. Even tell them, if you want, that it's gonna be a surprise. There's no reason for a BM to be given the chance to ruin a wonderful day.
Thanks -- I just needed to
Thanks -- I just needed to hear it from someone impartial. Our family and friends agree and understand why we've chosen to handle it this way -- I've had limited contact with the ex, but have seen first hand how she can manipulate the boys just to get back at FH. Thought that would change when she got remarried, but apparently not.
No problem. Planning this way
No problem. Planning this way will also reduce the stress in wondering how to handle the BM. Once that is out of your mind, and you've made your mind up to do it this way (if you choose to do so), you will free your mind to think of more important things to prepare for your big day