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just a fuking vent

stepmumof2's picture

Ok i'm fucking fumming!!
I'm going to vent this out right now.

My OH and I are low on money - was recently his bday. I took him out all day yesterday, blew more money than I should have.
Had a fantastic time with him - putting on a beautiful fake smile. As I am so ANGRY inside that i am getting little to none affection/attention. I have brought this up with him SEVERAL fucking times over the past 2months. (why can't we just go back to the days where you were courting me, in the early days, so much love, so much attention) etc.

Now he texts me, im going to go out with my mates tomorrow night for a birthday thing/drinks etc.
I reply to him, are you askinig me to come with you? or? i don't understand.
Nope - just him and his mates (when honestly yesterday was the ONLY time we have been out in the last 4 months!!

*thinking* ok sweety, hunny, where the fuk are you going to get the money to pay for that? and yes you can spend more money than we have going out and getting drunk with your mates. i will sit at home like a good little girl and mind the house.

fuck that shit.
i even ended up saying yep no worries, go.

Craving Normality's picture

That is something my SO would do. Thoughtless and careless. Have you got the skids at home- hope not. Go somewhere or invite your own friends over.

stepmumof2's picture

nah no skids at home, we have them every 2nd weekend.
im fuking still boiling inside. probably because all of my reply texts have been so calm and accepting.

luchay's picture

Oh yeah, I'm hearing you.

Can you arrange a girls night? Perhaps at a friends house so it doesn't cost (NOT at yours, you need to go out too!)

This happens here all the time! We are low on cash, we barely go out together but he manages to find time/money to take the skids to the football, go out with mates. While I sit here trying to find ways to save money LOL

Makes me SO angry - like - surely if there is spare cash for a night out we BOTH should be getting to enjoy it. When things are tight it's nice to know that your SO thinks of YOU as well as himself!

(sorry, not much help was I LOL!)

Craving Normality's picture

What else can you do - insist he comes straight home? The damage is already done. This has happened to me before numerous times. I know the feeling and it's crap. I usually follow it up by going out the next night and leaving him at home.

Craving Normality's picture

Wanna hear something of my story from 2 weeks ago. SO picks up his kids 10am Saturday morning. Spends his bill money buying them nikes on the way home. Drops them off with me and says he will be back in a couple of hours - he had a job to finish off. 4:30 rolls on and his daughter rang and said where are you dad. He said he was having a beer with uncle XYZ. Didn't here from him again until 1:50am. He had drunk too much and couldn't drive home. Wanted me to pick him up - I said no. 5 kids at home between 2 and 14. He caught a taxi home and asked me to pay for it. I refused. He found some money in his wallet. In the morning he wakes up demanding I drive him immediately to his car so he can get his son to football. I said no, find your own way back to your car. His sons game was starting in 15 mins and the field was 1 hour away. There was no way he was going to get there. Then he tried to be mad at me all day. WTF.

Cocoa's picture

first, get your anger out by writing (maybe that's what your post did?) then either talk to him or e-mail him about how when he does these types of thing it makes you feel used. hopefully, he'll listen to you and work on this type of thing. if not, you have much bigger problems. good luck

stepmumof2's picture

Craving Normality thats fucked up man. I would have lost it at him . Probably going to put a gps tracker on his phone tonight when he goes out. Make sure he says hez going where he is.
No point talking to him about why it makes me mad or upset.
You know what he was talking about this morning? Wheres my jacket? Lol wheres this? Obviously coz he wants to wear it. I should put all his favorite clothes in the wash today and forget to take them out of the machine so they are wet, as we don't have a dryer lol