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I'm sorry I have another question.

Jena714's picture

SS got an xbox from us the Christmas before last, and he took it to BM's. I know this was a bad choice but it was back when BM and DH were cool. DH wants to take it back but BM says no it's at my house now. Is there a way we can force her to give it back?

sickofitall's picture

Not gonna happen. Learned that early on when BM would actually keep new underwear we bought SD
and send her back in ratty ripped underwear. We bought underwear every couple of months because we were always left with all junk. LOL

Forget you ever bought it to keep your sanity and chalk it up to experience.

ncgal1980's picture

Ugh, we deal with this, too! We're constantly buying socks and underwear for the skids. No socks or underwear we send them to BM's in ever comes back. They come back in ragged-out, nasty stuff.

I bet we've spend $100 on that stuff in the past year for them. My question is, what the hell is she doing with all of it?! And where is all this ratty, torn-up crap that they wear to our house from BM's house coming from?! Beats me. I wish DH would grow a pair and say something to her about it, but so far, he hasn't. I'm trying to stay out of it, but it really does irritate me.

christinen's picture

Every time SD has taken something to BM's, we have never seen it again. We don't allow her to take anything over there anymore. Lesson learned.

tired and stressed's picture

I would tell the kid that if he hadn't taken his game over to his BM then he wouldn't be so bored. If you don't want to be bored, bring it back. SS needs to start learning consequences. I would not buy him anything else. If he wants to take back and forth that is one thing.

MamaFox's picture

From now on, why not make a federal case out of it?

Save receipts of all purchases for the kids, take pictures of all serial numbers. Record the Times anything is "borrowed" by the kids to take over there. If it does not come back in the same condition it left In, in a reasonable amount of time, make a police report of it being stolen.

Take that shiz to court!

May not make much a difference in court, but I bet a police report against her once or twice and nothing would ever be taken over there again.

moeilijk's picture

Kids don't make the rules. Something like an xbox is a gift in the sense of primary use thereof has been made available. As a parent, you bet I have a right to turn it off whenever I say, take it away, put in limits, and insist it stays in my house.

My $0.02.

Disneyfan's picture

Dad makes the rules at his house, not mom's. Once the game left his home, his ability to control it ended.

It's just like a BM buying the SK a cell phone. Once that phone enters dad's home, he and SM are free to set the rules on how it will be used or if it will be used at all.

ncgal1980's picture

I'd just take it as a lesson learned. I made the same mistake once with my sons' bio dad. We were on good terms for a while, and I allowed my kids to take their giant Lego collection over to his house one weekend. He "forgot" to bring it back when he dropped the kids off and said he'd get it to me next time he picked them up. That was about two years ago, and I've yet to see that big tote full of Legos.

I asked for it back a few times, but he just kept "forgetting" to give it to me.

That was the last time I let my boys take anything to his house. They don't see him at all now (criminal child abuse case pending against my ex against BS9 - long story), so it's not really an issue anymore.

I mean, you could take BM to court, but you'd end up spending more in court costs and possibly attorney's fees than you'd spend just buying another xbox. It sucks, but I think you're better off just letting it go. Just don't make that mistake again, no matter how friendly things are between DH and BM.