I told my Bf that on paper he is not a good package deal.

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Sometimes I feel like Im expected to put up and shut up, I told Bf that Im a much better catch than he is, I have absolutely no baggage, where as he has 2 kids from 2 mothers, he did'nt like that lol, he needed to be reminded though, Im not saying that children are baggage, I mean the stuff that comes with them, Bm's and so forth. I used to put up and shut up its true, but I've found my voice now, I've stopped taking Sd to school, she was so awkward it was exhausting and that was just twice a week, I used to take care of 2 skids full time and a full time job and they were no trouble most of the time, I loved them to bits, I went into this relationship thinking, I've done this before I can do it again, add to the mix, a guilt parenting Daddy, a bitch of a Bm, an Sd6 who is basically mannerless and so strong minded and rude, hmmm it is so different this time, do these parents realise that they are not the catch that they think they are sometimes? I know that if I had my own child, I would teach them to respect my Bf, so why dos'nt he do that for me? After being expected to be "Mummy" when it suited him, I've told him Im Mummy all the time now, I will be respected and I will be listened too, its early days yet, we split up last week, we needed to do that, Bf says that he gets it now, well we will see.

I used to do the school run

I used to do the school run too but after sd13 being constantly late I told my so that if she's not ready by dead on whatever time I would simply go without her and he would have to take her. He now makes sure she is ready so I don't have to nag and get wound up first thing in the morning before work.
I've also stopped cleaning up after them. I was constantly following them around with a dustpan and brush but now I leave everything for him to tidy up. Not my mess not my stress!
And yes you do all of the crappy jobs for the skids and yet none of the fun stuff like hugs.... he gets that.

''Not my mess, not my

''Not my mess, not my stress.'' I'm going to quote you on that one LOL

I disengaged, I quit the

I disengaged, I quit the school run too, there's a bus, not to mention it's only a ten minute walk from here to school! I quit getting them up in the mornings too! DH pretty soon saw how hard it is to raise kids.

i just find that the kids

i just find that the kids take the laziest easiest option and give no thought to the adult. they are number 1 and everyone should bow down to them. was i like that as a kid too? i hope not.

I agree with you that kids

I agree with you that kids will take the easy option, only when adults provide it though...right? I was done providing it! DH pretty soon got sick of providing it too when he 'took the reigns' finally.

"only when adults provide it

"only when adults provide it though"
hadn't thought about it like that thanks. yes take away the option and it's either do it the hard way or not at all. i will bear that in mind.
Also relates to other things. I offer them options when cooking and doing every day things and yes they always choose the option that creates more work for me so no option no stress and more time for me !

"only when adults provide it

Clare you must know my Sd

Clare you must know my Sd lol, you have summed her up exactly.

I hear ya janeyc. I've got

I hear ya janeyc. I've got kids and an ex, but I don't have baggage. My (now ex) bf was still carrying his baggage everyday, full of exw, kids, and overflowing with guilt. I wish I had looked at it that way much sooner. Some people haven't learned to put down their baggage and I need to find someone that has!