I don't believe this woman!
My SS(13) is coming across country next month to live with my DH and I...he's been asking to live with us for years and finally we had to go to court because BM said no and that the issue was "no longer up for discussions. Needless to say BM is a little cranky and is taking it out on SS. SS said he wanted to play football when he gets here, so today I signed him up. I emailed the info to BM so she would stay informed and even offered to email her pictures of his practice and videos of his games. She said she paid for him to belong to some golf practice thing in AZ and she wanted me to transfer it to our state of VA so he could continue and she didn't want football to interupt golf. I'm thinking, no problem. I contact the golf place and they said his year program is up in October and they will not transfer it. I email BM the info saying it will not transfer, but that I will make sure he stays involved in golf. The B***** emails me back just now and tells me "you can sign him up for whatever you want him to play and you know, I'll just keep all of his things here and then you guys can start your lives together"
WHAT IN THE WORLD! How are you not going to let your son take his personal things when he is moving across country! My SS asked me to sign him up for football! I didn't force it! I didn't write her back because I'm scared if I do I'll be too nasty. I know she must be huring for son to want to live with us, but good grief don't take it out on him.
Keep a copy of the email. Let
Keep a copy of the email. Let your ss come first. If he has nothing. ie clothes..etc...buy what he needs. Then contact your lawyers to retrieve his stuff.
I'm sure ss will pack some stuff! But if he is sent with the clothes on his back! call Child Services and let them collect all of his belongings...maybe it doens't have to go through lawyers!
She's angry. I understand. She feels her son is rejecting her. Its very clear in her response.
Dont write back, dont say anything until she cools off and yoru ss is under your home. Then you can act depending on his situ.
Either way, i'm sure she is in alot of pain emotionally right now and you actually writing her back about the sign up and keeping her informed was basically salt in her wounds. I understand you wanted to be helpful, but too early to have made contact. She is bitter right now and now is not the time to tell her about the sign up and info...let your hubby deal with her.
As far as taking it out on him...we are human, she is angry at him for wanting to leave and succeeding at it. My friend was livid at her son when he got up and left for his dads at 12. She never got over the pain or the feeling of betrayel.
Let bm cool off. She's a mother in pain right now. I wouldn't go near her!