If anything ever happened between me & DH I wouldn’t maintain a relationship with them, no. They’re young still, it’d be weird to keep in touch with them. DH could foster the relationship between our kid & the skids & I’d leave steplife behind!

I wouldn't try to maintain any kind of relationship with my SS19. I could see him possibly wanting one in the future, when he realizes what his mother did to him with the parental alienation, and I would consider it at that time, if he was mature and no longer enmeshed with her.

Edit: That's if DH died. If we got divorced, nope.

I think about this sometimes and my answer would be a hard no. I would want nothing to do with them or anyone else in their family including MIL, FIL, etc. All relationships would be over on my end.

If my DH were to pass away (god forbid) I know in my heart as insensitive as it is that I would not foster a relationship between skids and our shared toddler....no way...never. I just wouldn't......they would not exsisit to me as I would refuse to ever have anything to do with BM and BM comes with skids....so....no. I would actually probably move to a different state just to get away from them for good.

If the situation is a breakup/divorce situation.. I would probably not continue to have a relationship with stepkids.  Just like I wouldn't with a MIL.. or SIL... even if they were lovely people.. I would not want to remain in the same circle.  I would also want to respect my EX by not coming around and making their life uncomfortable.

If it was death.. then I think it would be more likely that I would have some contact after they were gone.

i’m from australia and my husband is asian so all 3 skids are in asia. If hubby died or we divorced it is 100% about skid issues and hubby not addressing them. I would leave back to Australia to finish my university studies and work. Since hubby is incapable with work responsibilities to care for our kids he wouldn’t be successful in getting custody of our toddlers.

also bio mum and family are bat shit crazy, i have kept all text message evidence from skids on what bio mum and stepdad did in the event i needed a restraining order and supervised visits with hubby without skids being present. They’ve excused and justified their mums behaviour and done so many things to my kids that raise big red flags.

my kids are dual nationality and schooling in my country 

if hubby died and suddenly skids want a relationship, they can eff off. You don’t get to treat your dad and us like shit until you can show off fakely that your the half siblings from friggin heaven When reality is you wanna appear like great siblings but are glorified half siblings who never wanted a relationship in the first place

i’f go on with my and my bio kids life and I don’t see my kids wanting a relationship with the 3 skids. They treat us like shit and seriously what kid would want to be around arseholes like that... skids don’t see the bigger picture and understand the concept of support system.

heck they got shitty at dad because mum is batshit crazy that her own family hates her and that means no one is allowed to contact her family. Ummm how the eff is that your dads issue and by the way hubby has had no contact with them since when he married her like 26 yrs ago

I have. My son's older brothers were just over for birthday dinner last week. my family and I love them and always will. They know their dad is screwed up and have a relationship with him that is cognizant of that fact. My ex would loose his shit over knowing they had been here. They are 19 and 21 so it is none of his business. 

Sometimes family ends up being a different situation than we imagined.

I don’t have a relationship with SS34 now with DH and I being together.