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Does this sound like a good plan

briarmommy's picture

We have my ss7 ALL SUMMER, he only goes home for one week in July to bm's because of my husband and his ex's divorce decree. So we are going to have rules. Well to start I put my foot down and my ss7 will be on his adhd medicine this summer, it will be better for him and for me and my bd. I figure with the focus he can get he will be able to spend a little time each day working on school work for the next year, I spent hours online today trying to find the most fun and educational work books and activites to do this summer for about an hour a day. Also the websites I've been looking at suggest 30min of physical activity a day for a kid with adhd so I will get his bike out and he can go with me and my daughter to the park or play in the back yard but it is happening every day. For most of the summer it is just him with me and bd since my husband works 8hrs a day and I stay home, so it has to be somewhat controlled. I've discussed with my husband and we are going to make a chore chart, little chores like setting the table and picking up his toys, maybe even helping me dust the end tables or coffee tables. When he does his chores without bit**ing and does them the way he knows they are supposed to be done he will get a star. Those stars will add up to rewards, like picking what we have for dinner or going to doller tree and picking any toy he wants. I also saw in another womens blog the 25 manners everyone should know by the time they are 9, will my ss7 is almost 8 so I am going to put all those manners on a poster board and show him what is expected manners wise. Maybe make it fun, by incorporating it into his chores, like if I notice him using good manners maybe he will get an extra star, or if he has a day of bad manners he will lose a star. Hopefully this will inspire him to try harder to be polite and nice. I am going to try to be POSITIVE hopefully that will rub of on him to. I need this to work, for me, for my ss7 and for my bd. I need my bd to learn from his examble in a good way. So heres hoping this summer goes better then last summer. Last summer he had no medication and was wild, it was our first time alone together and there was the new baby it was just to much so everyone cross your fingers so everything goes well this summer.

Kes's picture

It sounds as if you have put a lot of thought and effort into planning how things might go, and I hope it works well for you. If things go awry a little bit, as they well may do, kids being what they are, don't abandon the plan, just accept that it's not always going to go perfectly. Good luck with your summer!

briarmommy's picture

Thank you, thats how I'm trying to look at it. I know that it won't work all the time but even a little improvement is a victory, thats what I need to remember.

Jsmom's picture

I think you need to relax a little bit. He sounds like he needs some structure, but not to the extent you are talking about....I am all for discipline, but take it easy on the kid and let him enjoy some of his summer. After all he is only 7 and already on medication, how bad could he really be?

hismineandours's picture

Only 30 minutes of physical activity? what happened to the days of sending them outside and telling them to stay there all day? I encourage my kids to go outside as much as possible when the weather is nice. They can ride bikes, make a clubhouse, run, jump, kick a soccer ball, play basketball, or even lie in the grass and stare at the clouds. Structure is great, but kids also need time to play-it is how they learn and grow and IMO just as valuable as some math worksheets. It is especially crucial for adhd kiddos to release some of the energy.

I think having him do some sort of daily chore is fine-it is also good for him-teaches him responsibility and will also help him feel like part of the family.

Hopefully with meds he will be better able to control his behavior.

briarmommy's picture

I thought 30 min seemed like nothing to, when I was a kid I would be outside all day. I fiqure at least 30 min is good. My ss7 does love to read so I've been going to thrift stores and getting him tons of books that I will distribute throughout the summer to him. Thanks for the support