Do you think this is stalking?
BM left DH after having an affair 2 years before I met him. When he met me, she went nuts and tried to take the children off him.
Things settled down until just recently. They have been getting on ok and I think she has mistaken his friendliness. She phones here to talk to the skids even though she spent all day with them. I am sick of her always phoning and texting.
DH says that she has every right to and its all about the kids.
But last night, we went out as a family and took skids to watch football. She knew we were going and she turned up! She was on her own and was making her way towards us until she saw me.
She veered off and hovered around in a different part of the room for a while and them came to see the children. It was awful and awkward.
Am I being over sensitive?
it sounds just like my DH,
it sounds just like my DH, because of how him and BM end off their relationship, and came in the picture. BM always phone my DH for stupid things as if you couldn't make decisions on her own such as: where SD should go for spring break, what activities she's engaged in,school, mood, and all of the above. with that being said, the worse part is that i can't stand when DH make all this convo w/o muy presence. they talk while he is at work, email, txt etc. I told him as his wife and SO that i have the absolute right to know when him and BM speak and what about. Simply because i do not trust her, and because in the past before the divorse was final, she had told me how my DH will always be hers, and she loves him or always be the father of SD. Since my DH is soft spoken person and tries to keep us both separated w/ BM you can tell that he doesn't want to piss her off or simply scare...
I think it's another attempt
I think it's another attempt to cause trouble and alienate the skids. Our BM would call, text, buy stuff and do whatever to have some sort of contact with SD13, until she successfully alienated her from Dh. Now she is working the SS's. Now we are fighting for sole custody of the SS's.
I'd be careful, if she were working on getting the skids before, she's just changing angle to see what will work. The problem with alienation is once Dh figures out what is happening, it becomes too late. Read Divorce Poison, by Dr. Richard Warshak...it's an eye opener.
Thanks. I will. I wish DH
Thanks. I will. I wish DH would but I can't make him.
Yes - they have 50/50 shared
Yes - they have 50/50 shared care/custody
I don't know why you think
I don't know why you think it's a play for him?
Because as soon as she saw OP
Because as soon as she saw OP she went off in another direction if it was truly about the kids then she would have kept coming towards them and started talking to them instead she thought it was going to just be DH and the kids and as soon as she saw OP she was thrown off balance and had to re-group - it is quite obvious that the BM wants to get back with her ex!!
Yes - she had spent the whole
Yes - she had spent the whole day with them.
That's what I think too. I
That's what I think too. I think she had no choice but to come over after half an hour to say hello to the kids because just leaving would have been just too weird for words.
Why is she doing that? Why can't she move on? She is going to go through the whole angry woman scorned thing again - 5 years after she left him for another man. I just can't get my head around this. It's mental.
Has anyone else had something
Has anyone else had something like this? Did it escalate? What did you do? What should I do? My thinking is that it will get worse and when it does, DH will finally see what she is doing and sort it out. Is that naive?
I have been sitting here
I have been sitting here thinking about the past 3 years since my DH met me and the patterns.
She has always used the children as an excuse to stay in touch. They went for counselling because they were unable to co-parent the children without fighting about a year into our relationship. She used the counselling to re-live their marriage break up and she blamed him! I thought they were going to talk about parenting but no - she is utterly delusional about the way their marriage ended.
She came to my house a few months after I met him under the guise of seeing where her children were staying the night from time to time. It was 2 days after I had had breast cancer surgery and my girlfriend asked her to leave but she refused and came into my bedroom and told me she still considered him to be her husband.
She sat in the reception of his office later that first year, refusing to leave until he saw her. This was when she wanted full custody of the children (she got lawyers to write letters saying I was not fit to be around her children because my son has Aspergers). When he finally came out she hit him in public. He had refused to give her the skids passports because she wanted to take them out of school on a 3 month holiday. He said ok but he wanted to know when she was coming home. She refused to say so the court told him to keep the passports.
When we got a new car, she got exactly the same type a week later.
She comes across as the victim but I think she is dangerous. He feels sorry for her but she scares me. I think this last "showing up" thing has rattled him. I really think she had in mind to sit with him and be a family again. I feel a bit sick today.
I was wondering if anyone
I was wondering if anyone else had experienced this or something similar.
Sometimes I think they still want to be with each other. The other day, she showed up at 3pm and asked if her son was home. He finishes school at 3.15 and doesn't get home til 3.30. She was surprised I was here and she thought my DH would be here. She had a bag for him so she waited outside for ages.
That's twice in one week I wonder what would have gone down with those two if I hadn't been around.
I am feeling under siege in my home and personal life and it is very stressful.
Do you think women behave like this if there is no cause? Do you think my DH has a part to play? He called her the love of his life and mother of his kids the other day. What does that make me? A mistake?
Sorry but sometimes I think he still has feelings for her and she knows it.
Hahaha. I really love that
Hahaha. I really love that story. Is this normal? It's so creepy. Why do they hold out hope if our DH's give them no reason?