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Dealing with the damn house

Redsonya's picture

I love my DH - he is so awesome about standing up to BM. Really, I think its just that he is so sick and tired of hearing her nonsense everytime she calls that he is equally relieved to only communicate by text and email with her. He also shares ALL emails and texts with me and we decide together how to respond.

They are dealing with the house that they own together that she lives in. He has notified her that her options are 1) refinance the loan in her name 2) shortsale it, or 3) move out and turn it over to us (we'd rent it out).

The house is about $50,000 underwater but the loan isn't big at all. The payment including tax, insurance, and second is about $1200 a month. You really couldn't get a house in the area of that size for much less to rent. She says that she can't afford the morgage, which I would have sympathy for if she was making a real effort and not willingly working 30 hours a week for 12 bucks an hour, while doing nothing to better her situation. She found a fair housing organization that is supposed to help modify the loan so that the payment will be lower. She wants DH to cooperate and modify with his name still on the loan and maybe then the bank will let him off the loan. I know that the bank won't let him off of it unless she refinances.

We decided to notify her tonight that DH will consider cooperating with the modification and staying on the loan if she makes it financially worth his while. In other words, he gets to claim half of the mortgage interest and one of the kids on his taxes (we want this in writing) and the court orders will be modified that she must maintain and pay the mortgage on time. What do you think? It keeps us from having to fix and then rent the place. At this point, we have a really nice house together that the kids could come live in anytime. They all have their own rooms. DH could care less what happens with BM and her residence anymore and we are just trying to figure out the best way to get out of the mortgage and make it worth it to us to stay involved.

What do you all think?

buttercookie's picture

I'd force her to refinance it alone or sell it, you don't need to be unnecessarily financially attached to someone. Also do not "quick claim" the house to her because it will not absolve your husbands responsibility for the loan to be paid and it will make it more difficult in the future if he needs to force a sale. We learned this the hard way

Redsonya's picture

We definately won't quick claim it to her - I did some research months ago and realized that DH would still be liable for the loan, but wouldn't have the asset. That isn't going to happen.

We are going back to mediation and then court in the next month. In order to get her to refinance it alone, do we need to reserve her with papers indicating that we want the judge to order refinance or sale? At present, the court order states that a decision on the house is reserved by the court for decision at a later time. Since its in there, I guess we can make a legal request to have them decide now. Anyone know?

The house won't sell for what they owe, which is why we gave her shortsale as an option. If she can't refinance it, DH and I could take it over on our own, anyone think thats a bad idea?

buttercookie's picture

I don't know what the court will decide. I don't see anything wrong with you two taking over the house if you can afford it and the court allows it, but I wouldn't let her live there and I wouldn't take it over if her name is attached to it in anyway, Personally you'd be better off selling it but in this economy I think if you can rent it out that'd be a smarter financial move. Just be prepared to hear how you took her house if the judge allows this. Our BM was awarded the house, my husband against my advice quick claimed the house to her, she stopped paying, Since he quick claimed he did not have any say so, but on closer examination of the divorce decree her being awarded the house was contingent on her taking over the payments and refinancing within six months which she failed to do, we threatened to take her back to court and take the house if she didn't refinance, she sold it.