BM is being shady about visitation!!!
So I need some help for my DH on this one. We went to court and finally got visitation rights for him to see his 2 y/o son, two weeks in the winter starting Dec. 26th, ad four weeks in the summer, every year with a revision court date to be held in June 2010 so that the judge can follow-up on if BM has finally got her lazy ass off her couch and got a job or is taking classes towards a degree. I'm not holding my breath on that one, but this is our problem.
My husband is in the military, and has already put in a leave request for his assigned visitation time from Dec. 26th to January. BM lives in TN, we live in MA.According to the court decision, she has to meet us half-way, which ends up being some point in VA. DH has been asking her via phone since November 1st, "Can we set up a time and exact meeting place to do the switch off?" And she has yet to answer. One day, her mother's car is not working (she's too lazy to get a job like the rest of us and get her own), the next day, she'll just get back to him. It's now December 19th, and we still don't know what's going to happen.
My DH says he's not going to ask anymore. But I really do feel like he needs to send her something in writing, stating that he intends to have his visitation, and if she does not bring it up, he's not going to bring it up either. But I just have a bad feeling that she's going to try to screw him over somehow. I keep telling him to send her a certified letter stating his intentions, and that if she does not come up with a plan for transportation and notify us by phone or letter by December 25th, WE WILL SEE YOUR LAZY ASS IN COURT NEXT YEAR!
Anyone have any experience with this? I know that we would have to notify the county police, but any other advice? Really appreciate it.
Thanks.
Maybe he could email her (if
Maybe he could email her (if he has her email address). He can save the emails for court.
Did the judge point-blank tell her to go school and get a degree and/or get a job?
He does not have her e-mail
He does not have her e-mail address, but does have her myspace information. He scored big points with the myspace messaging last time we went to court because she had sent him hundreds of disgusting e-mails calling him a sperm donor, calling me names, etc. etc. And yes, the judge told her point-blank that she was the reason why America is falling to pieces. My words not his. He told her point blank that she is setting a horrible example for her son. Her mother, lives in the projects, subsizidized rent, works as a maid - has never had any ambition to do better for herself. BM herself attended one semester of college, dropped out, and stopped working after she was 3 months pregnant (April 2007) and has never worked since or even bothered to look. Her current favorite hobbies are using her child's CS money to change her rent a center furniture every week, playing her Wii system (bought with the CS money BTW), and stuffing her face on her grandmothers couch. She doesn't see why she should go to class or work cause hell, what else is CS for?
Wow, I wish more judges
Wow, I wish more judges would be like that!
seriously though, iam sorry
seriously though, iam sorry for your situation but i need that judge here..pronto... as far as your situation is concerned.. i would send a letter then send a signature card..that she has to sign in order to get the document..that works really well in court as well..but myspace is just as great..put down that we have called..give date and time, you stated.. blah blah blah....then it shows that your really up on your game..and that you really are wishing to see the child..
My guy is supposed to get
My guy is supposed to get his daughter today for the next 5 days and bm called and said the order is bullsh*t and she's keeping her for christmas, he can just go to hell. his lawyer says to call her (lawyer) when he goes to pick baby up from daycare today and finds that she's not there. Then police can be called, charges laid, etc. etc. Where will i be during all this? On my way home to my loving family, hiding out from all this drama. Weak of me? Yes. But i just can't handle it. I put up with a ton of drama, i don;t want it at christmas too. my guy says he understands and doesn't blame me. I think i'm going to take this next week and do some serious thinking if i'm really cut out for this, if i really want to deal with all this for the rest of my life. in the past week i've been accused of molesting and abusing sd, which is total bullsh*t. I don't think i can keep doing it, it's definalty taking it's toll.