Why do they do it?
This hasn't happened recently, but BM used to tell the kids that DH left them. When I say "them" I mean BM and the kids. He didn't leave the kids- he left her. I don't think that paying hundreds in CS a month, trying to call them every night and seeing your kids EOW is leaving them.
It hasn't happened with us in a while but it seems as though it's a recurring theme on this board- bitter exes telling the kids that their dad left them. What is it going to take for them to realize that our partners did not leave the kids, but left them?
- Anon2009's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
They know it.
They are just trying to build animosity toward the father. It's very sick and dishonest. But these narcissists don't care if they hurt their children. Even if it WAS true, what loving mother would tell a child that?
It spills over to the rest of the world, too--our BM told everyone that he left her for me--even though she had forced him out. I became the "home-wrecker." It's victim mentality drama at its worst and those who subscribe are true losers.
I guess its easier
than saying whatever the truth is - maybe someone cheated, etc. And they dont' want to look bad, in front of their kids! weird
"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin
Daddy doesn't care about US!!!!
Oh yeah BM would do that to SD everytime my FH (in the past) used to tell her now about something. No beotch he doesn't care about you, never has, was never with you and unfortunately knocked you up because he was drunk and stupid. BM wants to act like they could be this big happy family. BMs do this to get sympathy from everyone that will listen and then tell their kids this BS so they will resent their fathers. It is not until children are older and see that there parents have not been together that they don't buy in to this drama anymore. It's bad on the little ones though and I wish somehow BMs could be made to pay or get their rights taken away for mentally abusing their kids like this.
OMG, you so hit the nail on the head with this blog.
The whole theme of the Human Beast Bitch's complaint, since the day DH left, is how he left HER and the girls. One of the girls in now in college and has been for the past two years, the other is 14 now, was 11 at the time. He pays her better than 1400 per month, plus child care, etc, and he left the kids. He also pays for college, her truck, insurance, etc, but he left his kids. He also gets SD 14 every Wednesday, and EOW. But hey, he left his kids.
Hello psycho, no he left YOU. Not his kids.
I don't get the dumb shit these BM's say!
Thank you, I felt it a necessary topic
to discuss because it seems a lot of the BMs we complain about say that to the kids! My parents are divorced, and I only saw my dad on the weekends, but I never thought he left me. He called me every night, spent 1-on-1 time with me whenever I came over, paid my mom child support, paid for some of my activities growing up, etc. Plus (and this is a BIG plus) my mom did not practice PAS tactics! I think that made a huge difference, and explains why I was (and am) not like a lot skids out there. If both parents are sane people who put their children above their own issues then the kids can still turn out to be ok!
I'm glad you and your SD have a close relationship, and I think she can see through what her mother says.
.
deleted
My DH ex took it to a different level
He left her because she flew to a different country to meet a man she "was in love with". Nice thing to do when you're married huh. So while she was gone DH took the kids and move out. he rented a nice house, took only his things and said see ya. Her version to the kids and her friends has been "I kicked him out because he was a drunk and a pill popper" Now-her family knows the truth and so does his, but her friends and neighbors did not. Well friends of DH set all the neigbors straight, and I set all her friends straight. She still tries to play oh poor pitiful me, but we just ignore it. She told DH once that I was mean, so I put a sticker on my car that says, "I'm not mean, you're just a sissy". Apparently I made her cry like 3 times-lol
"A parents job is to eat as much sh*t as we have to so that the children do not."
Hmmm
I had to listen to this to some extent from my mom growing up - but yes my dad left her and my sister and I so he could cheat. My mom found out and kicked him out. My mom made sure we knew why he left and even drove us by where he was living to see if some other woman was there with us in the car. Not cool. That's something you don't forget. We never had much contact with him even though he lived just a few miles from us. He never paid child support without a fight.
The only birthday of mine he really acknowledged was my 16th. He showed up to take me to dinner. He took me to Ken's pizza where he proceeded to order me a glass of wine. Hmmm, good dad huh? Then when he realized I was a little tipsy, took me to a bar called Lucille's (which is where he really wanted to be -real high class - can you tell?) where I got even more tipsy, then when he realized how bad it was he insisted we see a movie before he took me home so I could sober up. That wasn't enough I guess so we hung around and saw the same movie again. My mom was pissed when he showed up with me. She was a teacher and it was a school night.
So yes, we were abandoned and even still to this day we are. We only see him when he shows up in the lot he owns next door to us. I call my sister and tell her our sperm donor is in the lot next door.
Looks like some of these BM's don't know what abandonment means.
"OCD sucks"
Habit and routine have an unbelievable power to destroy.
--Henri de Lubac