it is a personal decision, depending on the situation. There are alot of things that factor into the decision to throw, or not to throw. JMO"~waiting on the world to change~"

"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere

I wouldn't want to throw out every pic of myself with the ex. Because I spent a lot of my life with him, and there are both good and bad memories.

H would disagree. He can't stand anything to do with my past, regarding ex or old bf's.

But the past is past. I am not jealous of any old gf's, etc. H may have had. He has his memories, I have mine.

As for my sons, when one or both of them is settled, has their own home (both work on the road, traveling) I'll simply ask them if they want the albums. If they don't, that's ok. I'll just keep til I die, then they can decide whether to pitch 'em or keep 'em. Attitudes change over time, and what they may not want now they may want somewhere down the road.

I don't need to try to "erase" evidence of our previous lives and loves. It's part of what makes us who we are today.

I married my first wife 15 years ago. It didnt last and court date was 1 day before 5 year aniversary. No kids, no assets, no allimony. No photos. I dont have anything at all. It would serve no purpose other than a reminder of a failure in life.

I kept stuff from my first marriage. It's all in box...all the stuff that has him in it or was from our dating days. I haven't opened it since it cleared customs from Australia back to here. I'm not sure why I keep it. Most of it is because he turned out to be a sick person and I left him...and I'm afraid that one day I'll see him on the news and not in a good way, and maybe the police would want more info on him (not that they've cared so far what two wives have had to say). Anyways, there are a few things that don't have negative connotations connected to them...a couple pics of us together that I keep just because, well, I look damn cute.lol
I don't think you have to throw anything out unless it truly bothers you. I mean, I don't look at this stuff because it would upset me and remind me of what a sh*t he is and how stupid I was for falling for his crap. But I also know that I can't throw it all away because it's like erasing my whole life while we were together. It's like for 6 years I didn't exist or something. Yes things were bad, but they weren't always bad...and to me, it's important to have some kind of memento of the journey I've taken...some thing to remind me of where I've been and all I've been through, and how strong I truly am...especially when I doubt myself. It helps to remind me that I am capable of much much more than I give myself credit for. To throw it all away would kind of erase all the years that I put in with him that, no matter how terrible, helped me to learn and grow and be more comfortable in my own skin. I don't want to forget the lessons I have learned.
Don't second guess yourself because your instincts are telling you exactly what you should do.

I wouldnt want my dh to throw anything of mine out w/out my knowledge and consent.. so why would I not afford him the same respect and consideration???? That is what it comes down to.. Do unto others as you would have done unto you.

I say.. its not yours.. hands off.

I have been divorced twice, one I have a son with, and the other no kids. I don't have a single picture of me and either of them together. Not a one.

I personally don't see the point in keeping them, any of them.

So please don't feel out there! I agree 100% with you Melis.

And, if my SD's have pics of thier mom and dad together, good for them. But they need to stay at moms house because they aren't coming in mine.

JMO

I think that the decision to keep or not to keep pictures/momentos from a previous relationship should be a personal decision...The key word being that is should be a "personal decision"....I don't think it's right for anyone to go threw another persons belongings (married to them or not) and take it upon themselves to throw out pictures/momentos. Those things don't belong to them and are not theirs to throw out...

I would be madder than hell if my husband went through my things and took it upon himself to throw out old pictures ect from my previous relationships...The principal reason would be that it was a violation of my privacy and he didn't have a right to throw out things that were mine.. To me it just boils down to respect and consideration...

In a perfect world their would be retroactive abortion capabilities. ~ digusted