All,

We flew to visit my 16yo SS at his Military School for Parents Weekend. It was an amazingly good weekend. Seven weeks ago we dropped off a pudgy, slouching, moody young man with low self confidence and low self esteem. He was a good kid who I would trust with all of my worldly possessions and with my life but I could not believe one word that came out of his mouth. He was a manipulator and had a really bad habit of only telling us what he thought we wanted to hear.

On Friday morning we met up with a very tall, young man with a very flat stomach (unlike his StepDad ) who was obviously very proud of himself and confident in his contribution to his Troop and the Corps of Cadets. That is when the first lumps in the throat and prideful welling of tears started for Dear old Dad.

We accompanied him to 25 minute mini-classes through his entire schedule. We also got his grades, 4 A's, 2 B+'s, a C+ and an F. On the surface that may not look stellar but he has not had a Math class in more than a year thanks to that damned block scheduling which I think is just about as worthless as boobs on a bull. No disrespect intended to boobs or to any teachers out there. He is barely failing Trig. Now, as crazy as it may sound I am most proud of his F in Trig. There was not one missing assignment in that class which is a truly miraculous improvement over last year. We scheduled a PTC with his Math instructor and got him synced with the Math tutoring lab and with his teachers office hours for extra help.

The C+ was in English. He would have had an A except for two Zero's for not turning in weekly writing journal assignments. I was ready to go cannibal on his ass for that but decided to hold off until we finished the rest of his mini-classes for the day. When we got to his Computer Theory class (B+) he had another Zero for a paper he did not turn in. My cannibal session on his ass was pretty much a foregone conclusion at that point until he asked me to have a sit down with he and his Computer Theory teacher and his English teacher. It is a good thing that I waited to go cannibal or I would still be chewing on my foot.

The three of them (SS, Comp Teacher and Eng Teacher) explained to me that he was one of the top students in Eng and Comp but with the time demands of classes, homework and Corps of Cadets activities that he was not able to get enough library time to type up the journals/papers. All writing assignments have to be turned in electronically on an assignment submittal system who's name escapes me. The Skid and the Teachers explained that the demand for the the computers in the library is high enough that each Cadets time is limited. At that point the Skid told me that having a computer on his desk in the barracks would allow him to manage his time to make sure he did not miss any more assignments. The Teachers enthusiastically concurred that many kids have computers in their rooms and that with the time demands of the environment that a computer is a very necessary time management tool.

The final class we went to was US History. One of his A's. The teacher returned a test that the kids had taken last week. My SS got a 90 on it. The teacher went through the answers, then reviewed his syllabus and class policies with all of the parents. At the end of class the teacher had time to speak with the parents who wanted time with him. My SS went to his teacher at that point and informed the teacher that one of the questions that had been marked correct was actually wrong. The teacher thanked my SS for bringing the error to his attention then told him that the grade would stand as noted.

So, lets review the weekend. My SS who formerly could not tell the truth under any circumstance, spent an entire year claiming to be on two sports teams that he never attended while doing God only knows what with his marginal friends, did almost no homework and when faced with any adversity at all would just collapse and do absolutely nothing has in 7 short weeks lost 25 pounds, walked 30 straight miles for a cancer fund raiser, completed RAT week with countless hours of drilling and obstacle courses, successfully faced all kinds of unpleasant adversity dealing with life as a New Cadet, developed a plan to obtain the final tool that will allow him to perform to his potential in two classes that he could improve in (a computer), notified his teacher of a misgraded test that was not in his favor, and would not break one rule the whole weekend even though his SDad was telling him it was OK to take his uniform hat off while we were eating dinner outside.

I know what he is going through because I went through it myself when I was in Military School for my last three years of high school. I am his Dad and I am proud of him. I am still dealing with the lump in my throat and welling eyes. Mom has been a weepy mess. Proud but weepy because her baby has made this amazing transformation in to a young man. Good thing I am not as big of a wimp as Mom.

We went to Sam's and bought him a lap top after the Parent's Weekend parade and awards ceremony on Saturday. Right after he was promoted from RAT to New Cadet and got his first awards for high performance in the Corps and in the Band. I was happy to spend the money on the computer.

Now we will see if he can stay focused and use the computer as a tool and not get distracted by IM'ing the friends from his former school and playing on-line games.

7 weeks ago I would have said that the chance that he could do the right thing was absolutely ZERO. Today I am confident that he has a chance of doing the right thing. 7 weeks is not long enough for me to have absolute trust in his character but I am even more of a fan of his than I have been all along.

It is great being a proud Dad instead of a grouchy StepDad.

Best regards,