Bio father throws a tantrum when he doesn't get his way
I have a son (5) and coparent with his father. For a long time we did not get along bcuz long story short he left me when I was pregnant because I wouldn't get an "A word". Anyway after some years have passed were passed it. For the most part we get along and when he wants to schedule extra time with our son or wants to switch weekends I do when I can or don't have plans. He only has our son every other weekend and the rest of the time he is with me. Just recently I was nice enough to switch last weekend and this weekend so he could take our son to be in his friends wedding. So my son will be with him tomorrow- Sat. when he should be with me all weekend. But last weekend was his and his father let him stay with me. Now we were discussing upcoming spring break which is march 21-25. Our agreement states we split it with the first half going to me this year because my weekend is before that and he gets the second half since his weekend is after. He asked me if I wanted to switch to having the whole spring break one year and then he get the next when we talked last night. I did not agree since with Easter being in there that may get screwy. Easter schedule goes that I get my son Sat. night- Sun at 1 this year and he get Sun from 1-7 and it reverses the next year. So depending on whose weekend it is, it is kind of confusing so I told him this last night. Well that would make the schedule this year I get our son March 19-23 then he get 23-26th and bring him back to me Sat. night and I get him Easter morning and he can have him Easter day after 1. Well he freaked out on me. Saying 4 drop off/pick ups is stupid. Thats alot of driving. (he lives 30 minutes away). I told him I understand this but thats the schedule. He suggested I give up Easter morning and let him have it. I said no because he got Easter morning last year and he started going off on me. Saying im being unreasonable. How am I being unreasonable by following the schedule and wanting my son for Easter morning when its mine this year? I mean I understand where he is coming from with the back and forth four times but him expecting me to give up a holiday morning is not right. Am I being unreasonable? He always seems to get this way when I won't do something for him. Like throws fits if I say no to anything.
100% agree. I give a little
100% agree. I give a little and he keeps pushing for more ALL the time.
When did the word "abortion"
When did the word "abortion" become an offensive word that could not be spelled out or said out loud? It is a legitimate and legal medical procedure.
I didn't want to offend
I didn't want to offend anyone. That's all.
I wasn't trying to sound
I wasn't trying to sound petty saying I'm being nice by switching things just pointing out that its something I do not have to do for him when it is outside our agreement but I do for the sake of our son. I don't want to do the whole week of spring break him being gone because I would hate to go without seeing my son the whole week. Spring Break around here is always the week before Easter so it would always fall in the spring break. I mean maybe its something to consider if its in fact not. I can look into that. My problem is his demanding attitude when I try my best to be fair and reasonable with him. Even if I had all of spring break this year and him have next year he would still go to his father's for that weekend on friday evening and I'd want him back for Easter the night before like the schedule says so that really wouldn't make it any less trouble on him with the driving.
Yes I do get he spends more
Yes I do get he spends more time with me but it should be that way in our case. He has been arrested 3 times for DUI and drinks and drives all the time and abuses alcohol so I'd like his exposure to his father to be limited to what it has to be.
That schedule sounds
That schedule sounds awful.
The kid should spend all of spring break with one parent every other year. That way if one of you decides to take the kid on vacation during spring break, you aren't stuck dealing with a switch mid break.
The original schedule may have worked just fine before, but now that kid is in school and both parents will want to start traveling with him, full breaks with one parent makes life easier for everyone.
Just stick with the CO from
Just stick with the CO from now on.
From now on stick with order
From now on stick with order unless it is absolute emergency - sick or dying etc
You give someone an inch they take a mile
Give an inch and they will
Give an inch and they will try to take a mile and pretend the inch never happened. Stick to the custody order no matter what and after you shut him down for the hundredth time he will rarely ask for favors. DH used to let SS go with BM anytime she needed him but she would never let him go to any of DH's family events no matter what. So now he tells her no so She throws a fit, calls him names, gripes about him on Social media OWELL. There's no negotiating with terrorist
I think I'll just stick to
I think I'll just stick to the plan so its set in stone. Easter is Easter Sunday and i have the right to celebrate it with my son and have him here with my side of the family this year. My entire family isn't going to move Easter because of my parenting plan. I already have to deal with the entire summer being a week here and a week with his dad on and off from june-august and i want to spend half my spring break each year with my son so we can go somewhere for a few days so he can still do the same. He will have him wed-sat. And i think thats fair.
Stick to the schedule. That
Stick to the schedule. That minimizes all kinds of issues. End of story, end of problem.
We never had any issues when we stuck to the schedule and forced the Sperm Clan to stick to the schedule.
They tried to periodically guilt us and the Skid into giving them more time but when we would be flexible they would get more and more unreasonable in their demands. So, we kept a rolled up copy of the CO, the Supplemental Rules for the county where our CO was ordered, the Sperm Land state guidelines for visitation and support and the same things for our state and county of residence so that if they so much as twitched out of alignment with the CO we could smack them repeatedly about the head and shoulders with either the rules that were in place or the rules that would be in place if we filed for change of venue due to SS's more than 10 years of residence in our location.
That shut down the manipulations from the shallow and polluted end of his gene pool and kept them under control for the most part.
It works well. At least it did for us.
Good luck.