Where to start?
I have been married to my wonderful husband for 8 years now. For 8 years we had a lot of drama in our relationship from his two daughters, ex-wife and his family. 8 years ago when we got married, he actually divorced his first wife and we married the same month. My husband’s family disowned their own son based on stories his ex-wife told them. When my husband was hurt in Iraq , I made that phone call to his mother just in case he would not survive his injuries. Our relationship started from then on. My husband had a real battle with his ex-wife and his two daughters. His ex-wife inform the girls about everything that was going on in mu husband’s and ex-wife lives. I mean every court proceedings, every child support issue was known to then a 9yr old and a 11 yr old. We tried to insure the girls it is not what it seems like. We tried to talk to their mother to stop that behavior and let my husband be a father to his girls without them knowing the adult issues. No success. The girls barely saw there father during that time because mother told the girls that they can decide if they want to spend time with their father. 5 years ago his youngest daughter called us and was crying and screaming that she cannot live with her mother because her mother did not treat her right. Mother agreed and she moved in with us and my 2 own children. That is were the problem starts. My step-daugher tried her best to separate me and husband. Many lies, many action that were not appropriate from her. Best example is when my husband and i sit on the couch she would make a point to sit right in the middle of it. My husband be laying on the floor, she would lay on top of him. When we are supposed to go somewhere she just wanted them two to go w/o me or my 2 children. She constantly complained about how I was treating my children better than her and gave them more. During her time here we had many arguments over her especially because my husband was scared of discipling her because she would say that she would move back to her mother whenever things didn't go her way. So, he learned to accept her behavior and let her do whatever she wanted. She started to use marijuana and drink at 15 years old. She was hospitalized twice in psychiatric hospital because she tried to commit suicide. She sneaked out the house to have sex at nights in our drive way, etc… she didn't want to follow especially my rules of the house. She only saw her mother when she needed money or clothes. She would say if she did not get what she wants that I will just go to moms and she will give it me. I tried my hardest to be fair to all the kids but my kids were put on the back burner many times because of her attention seeking behavior. This year April, after her last psychiatric hospitalization, my husband decided it was best for her if she would move to Indiana with his mother. So she did. She moved there and we start realizing that all of a sudden my husband’s parental rights were taking away. His mother or sister started to make decision for his daughter and then just tell my husband afterwards. We started to realize that all of a sudden his mother and his sister did not want to have anything to with me. When I posted pictures on Facebook from my family or kids, they were ignored. Whenever I posted pictures of my husband or my step-daughter they were liked and commented on. Phone calls to me or my two children became little to nothing. We are at the point were his family isn’t talking to me at all. When his daughter came on vacation with a friend for a week, his daughter did not want to speak to me or my 2 children. His daughter talked to me once and that was to argue with me that I don’t give her any money but I give everything to my children and not to her. What by the way is not true. We pay her car payment, her insurance, phone bill, and send his mother additional money for the expense and when she flies out here the ticket is about $500 and we have to pay for her dogs kennel. So, in reality she is receiving way more then my children. However, when she was her, her friend told us horrible stories how she knew everything that was going on in our house and she mentioned to me that you are not mean as I was pot rayed as. My husband did not say a word over his daughters behavior what really bothered me because during that week I and my kids were ignored and he spend all the time with her but we were excluded. His daughter did not want to speak to my children AT ALL. My husband and I had arguments over her behavior but it seems very hard for him to accept the fact that I should not be disrespected either. The only time my husband and I argue is over his daughter. We are at the point that we are talking about divorce so he don’t loose his second daughter and his family. We never argue over anything else and we have a strong marriage in every other aspect of life. It is so bad that when he talked to his daughter the other day and told her that she will be responsible for her own phone bill that his mother called him and flat out told him that his sister will put her on her plan because she dont make a lot of money. We taught our kids that when you are 16 you will get a job and be responsible for your phone bill and car insurance. She does work and has her own money. His family does not talk to me or my children anymore. I will not let his family hurt me or my kids, especially since they took them in as their own grand-children and niece and nephew. I don’t know what to do anymore, it is taring my family and my marriage apart. It hurts my children because they are being punished. Please, help me.