I’m almost ashamed of myself….almost. This is long, I apologize.

I will start by saying that I have asked exH repeatedly not to put me in the position where I am in contact with his wife and not him. I try to explain to him that while I understand she is part of DD’s life, and appreciate the fact that she is very good to DD, she is not the one I signed up to parent this child with and I expect to not have to deal with her. Of course, this goes ignored.

Last weekend ex asked if he could get DD Wed night & keep her out of school Thurs. Their old house was getting torn down to prepare for building the new one. He thought the kids would think it was cool to watch. I said fine, I didn’t think missing one day of school would hurt her. The only thing that wasn’t mentioned was how she would be getting back to home on Thursday night. We have always worked it so whichever parent is asking for the “out of the ordinary thing” would go to the other parent’s house instead of meeting halfway like we do for the normal visitation. I assumed he would be bringing her back to my house sometime in the evening. (You know what they say about assuming)

Tuesday at work SM texted me asking if it was okay for them to get DD, and meet them at 4:30 at the standard meeting place. I didn’t answer right away because I was at work. A bit later she texts DH and asks him to have me text her back. Pushy much??? When I got home I responded that I already discussed it with exH and it was fine that they take her, but I wouldn’t be able to meet them because I had a cake due. My phone died right afterwards because it’s a POS. The next morning, after I have it charged, I see a response from her…”We have a lot to do and can’t bring her home so we might not get her. I guess I will text you tomorrow to let you know if we’re picking her up”. I was pissed that once again she was being cast aside because it was inconvenient!!! This was after I already told her what has happening and she was so excited. This is how the rest of the conversation went….completely downhill…lol.

Me: I am sending a note to school like she is missing tomorrow and being picked up today. If he isn’t tell him to call me at work. I would think he would be willing to take the extra few minutes out of his day so that he can spend time with his daughter.

Her: This has nothing to do with DD, our house burnt down and we are busy dealing with that.

Me: I don’t see why he can’t take a little bit extra trime, but it’s typical that if it isn’t convenient for him he doesn’t want to do it. When he asked me about it he never once mentioned that he wouldn’t be bringing her home. I have a cake scheduled due and I cannot meet him. I don’t know what so desperately needs done to a torn down house that he can’t take the extra half hour to bring her back…instead he just isn’t going to get her at all…hell of a dad. She is very disappointed she may miss it.

Her: It has nothing to do with him not wanting to get her, there is a lot of stuff we have to do. Plus we have to be there in case something goes wrong and my husband is a very good dad. And you can let DD know , we will get her and we will bring her home, so you can bake your cake.

Me: I am working, not simply baking a cake, fyi. It is my job. Had he let me know ahead of time I could have made arrangements to meet him. I, however, cannot blow off a paying customer. I’m sorry if that concept is too difficult to understand. I’m sure you can handle it if anything happens while he is gone. Of course, by that time of evening I would expect it would be done and any problems would have been dealt with considering the house is being demolished in the morning. I sent the note with DD that she would be picked up and miss tomorrow and I asked her teacher to send any homework home with her.

I know I was wrong and completely went into attack mode. Clearly I have to have the discussion again with ex about having the wife communicate. Of course, she was waiting in my driveway when I got home from work that day.